I feel the same way. My husband of 9 years just left me and my 3 boys he says he doesn't want to be married anymore and isn't in love with me anymore. I have so many different emotions that I just don't know how to keep going. I can't seem to get it into my mind that it is real. I keep thinking he is just depressed and that he will come around but I think he is happier now and that hurts even more. Plus, it doesn't help that I have to see him 2 times a week when he see's the boys. If I could just cut him out of my life I could move on but I can't because of the boys. I am so scared for that moment that I have to see him with another woman and even more scared for the moment that I have to hand my children off to him and another woman. I don' want this life and don't know how to deal with it.
Counseling is not for everyone, but maybe something you should consider. You are going to have to coparent with this man, so finding a way to make peace with the situation is essential to survival.
I didn't want to be divorced either. I thought we were happy. It turned out that "I love you but am not in love with you" is code for I am cheating on you. It sucks. It is hard. It is awful. I hate it. But it is what it is. I work hard to keep a healthy outlook and to not let this thing define me. Counseling didn't work for me, but I belong to a support group that has helped.
Try to find avenues for help. Some people are resilient and can heal on their own. Others need a bit of support.
I am sorry for your pain. Know that you are not alone.
Help: Time heals. You need a good family lawyer to consult with and if you can't afford one try the following: Legal aid for low income, ask at the nearest courthouse or the Bar Association. See about job training and lower cost day care at a women's services center or unemployment office. Be sure you get your child support! The way he's talking, there could be another woman. Do you both (or just you) have insurance for counseling? Do you go to church and want to talk to a Pastor about this? Someday another nice person may come along to be with you and your child. Life is long. Hang in there. Let us know how it goes. We do care.
My suggestion is to get counseling (not with a pastor unless they are okay with the divorce thing)......pastors have an agenda..... a secular counselor does not.
I mention this, because I went to a pastor (baptist) and it nearly destroyed my life; even after 10 years I suffer because of what he did.
See an attorney (first visit usually free) and get into counseling; protect yurself and your daughter.
You are too young to waste your life with someone who doesn't want to be with you. Life is too short. Three years in and he tells you he made a mistake by marrying you?? What is he going to do at 10 years, 15, 20?? It is frankly cruel.
Get your life in order and make a plan. You have a child to raise. If you are not financially independent, start working on a plan to get there. Start building a support network. Make plans.