Lisa: I have been divorced since 2009. I received alimony for about 2 years (was only working part time due to an injury and am over 50). I thought after the court date and waiting period that everything would be over/settled - well, it wasn't. He took me back to court every year trying to slash or eliminate the alimony. He was only able to cut it a little because he was paying for our grown daughter's health insurance (Obamacare). He did not even give her an insurance card (he lost it and never requested another one). He was only giving me 11K/yr. and it was tax deducible on his end, but I was heavily taxed on it. Our daughter eventually got a job with benefits and we learned not to depend on him for anything. I do hope you get what you need, but things like child/spousal support usually don't go far enough. If you need to stretch your money, I recommend the following: Food Pantry, shopping at food warehouse/discount supermarkets and shopping at Thrift Shops. Some only have a cell phone and not a home phone these days and I have just a little extra cable t.v. and economy (slower) Internet. My Lawyer told me not to involve myself with what the ex is doing with his personal life and I think that was good advice. Good luck to the ladies they are involved with - they are going to need it. I look like the two ex girlfriends my current boyfriend has - it is a little creepy, I know. I don't know if you have gone into court yet or if the divorce agreement is done, so I can't help you with the contempt charges. All I know is what my Lawyer said which was "now its a court order (when we went to court involving the alimony) and he has to do it". Hope this helps. Two and a half years is a long time. Hope it ends soon so you can move on and if you have children together, I would recommend cutting ties with him after the children are grown unless it is an urgent matter. Our daughter was 18 when he left and is now 25. I leave voicemails about twice a year if something comes up concerning our daughter and I only hear from him if someone dies.
I guess I have a very odd stance on support .. if we were still married he would be paying and even though we are divorced .. his income goes up 40% and mine goes down 70% there is a study that was done on single uneducated mother's. I hope that I can come a point where I get a life and a career .. this stuff is just down right STUPID and that's putting it mildly!!! Here in IL they really won't even look at cutting support unless there is a real need that is not limited to straight up job loss. Even then they usually won't look at it for 3 years .. at least that is the county I have filed in .. I only pray it stays that way. I don't imagine he's going to go away quietly .. I really have what I want and that is sole custody of the kids so the decisions I need to make I can make without discussion from him. We operate under a don't ask don't tell policy .. he don't ask .. I don't tell. What the kids want to tell him is up to them my only policy on that is IF it involves ME it's a subject that is COMPLETELY off limits. He is constantly up in my business in terms of drilling the kids about what I'm doing. They have gotten good at the standard answer of Don't know. I'm hoping we can move after this is all said and done .. I don't know .. it will be hard telling. I DO plan on getting some kind of job that I don't have to keep doing what I'm doing I can only hope that he keeps his job long enough for me to get an education. He owes what he owes and I'm like a bad penny .. I just won't go away .. lol. We'll see.