Dear Diana, First of all forgive yourself. Now you need to allow your husband his time to grieve the betrayal of his trust in you. Please try and understand that his whole world as he knows it has been turned upside down right now. He needs to work this out on his terms in his time table not yours. It is natural when we have done something we are not proud of to just want it to go away. Lot's of people handle depression in a self destructive way so you are not alone. Now you know better and can get the medical help for your issues so please make that a priority . Your pairing is not ideal at best. I do however have to believe if two people care enough they can find a way to make it work. From personal experience I don't think you will get your husband to change who he is very much. I to am married to a only child. Not always but most times the are the center of everyone's universe from parents, grandparents and all the extended family. This is how he was molded and fired and it is unlikely you will be able to crack the layers of the golden boy. Can you live with this reality if it doesn't change much. Get a housekeeper and if paying the bills is a big issue to you have an accountant set it up for you. You do have a lot more power by being the one handling this. Think of creative ways to make things work for both of you no matter how unconventional it seems. The key is to try and solve these problems the best you can. If you are still trying to conceive I would certainly put that on hold for the time being and take action not to get pregnant. Please believe me when I say putting a baby into the mix right now would be worse for everyone including the baby who has the right to be born into a happy, healthy, secure family. You might also want to consider the genetic issues with passing on your genes. My nephew has bi-polar which he got from his father who was also bi-polar. It is not what you would want to wish on a child. There are other options to be parents. This might just solve the conceiving issue for your husband by taking the spotlight off him and putting it on to you. His ego sounds real fragile in this area. If you don't feel hopeful for your marriage and don't want to do the really hard work don't waste your life there. Seek a therapist to deal with your childhood issues about feeling second best to your parents. We bring this stuff into the marriage and it impacts that marriage. I wish you well and hope what is best for you both is what comes out of this whether or not it is to stay married. Do not make life altering decisions while angry . Your choices then are usually wrong.

Thank you both for your advice! It was nice to hear an outsider's opinion of the situation. We have stopped trying to conceive and after learning about my own diagnosis I am questioning if I ever want to have children in my life. I know that things between us will be rough for a while, but I am wanting to work this out. I am tired of running from my issues.I am hoping between the therapy and medications that I can find a way to work this out for the best, whether we stay together or go our separate ways.

Dear Diana, I know you will be OK. You are facing these problems head on with professional help. I wish you all the very best. Your life can be full, happy and fruitful no matter what the outcome of your marriage. Sometimes even with the best of intentions some couples are not meant for each other in the end.