After years of abuse and a refusal to divorce, I finally thought I was free on January 27, 1997 when HE took me to court to try to delay me from moving out the city. I asked the judge " Am I divorced"? the judge said yes! Finally free at last. But when I left the court house my husband said You are not FREE! I didn't pay him any attention. Years later after getting ready to re-marry I went to get my paper work from the court on my divorce ( because I moved quickly a few times, I didn't have perm address, so I never got the final paper work) only to find out my divorce was pending. Now its 2014 almost 2015 and my divorce is still pending. The last two years my husband has located me and tells me we should get back together, I say no and try to be pleasant so he will agree to finalize the divorce, he will say "Ok' I will do it, then he takes off. Its a mind game of continual control, I can't move forward, no one seems to care at the courts, I don't know why its pending and I have no money for attorney fees; there are no minor children, no assets, I just want to be FREE!!!
Feel trapped for life, feel the court is helping him emotionally abuse me, and I can not have my life or ever find true love, for a mistake I made at 18, I am now 46 when does it end?
Tired: I did not move, but did not receive my paperwork stating the divorce was final so my Lawyer got it at the courthouse and sent it to me. My ex filed in 2008 and stalled for nine months to avoid alimony (long story). Since you do not have money for an Attorney, I recommend you contact your local Bar Association to see if there is anyone doing free legal work ("pro bono") or talk to someone at a local abused women's agency or seek Legal Aid for low income people in your community. Hopefully it is mistake of some kind since the Judge stated you were divorced especially since there are no assets and no kids involved. Make sure everything in the divorce agreement was addressed if you had one.
Thank you for your feedback, I did try our local bar association and it seemed to complex for the person. That was many years ago though. I think all you share is valid. I just have to start advocating for myself again. I got burned out, but I am determined to get this finished this time.
Again Thank You simply for responding.