I appreciate your situation, and I am a man. My suggestion to you is one that applies to all of us, and that is to realize that it is dead with him. He has shown repeatedly that he does not care for you, and so you should take this moment to realize that the rest of your life begins right now. Of course it will take time to move beyond all the emotion that he has stirred up in you, but you should begin the new life right now. I think that when people (men, or women!)start on a path that ends a relationship, they do it willingly, and know what the outcome is likely to be. It is often up to us to speed it along, by throwing a fit or arguing it into the ground.
If I can offer advice, I would suggest taking each day as it comes, realize that it is indeed over, don't anticipate support from anyone, and survive to live again.
“Just remember - when you think all is lost, the future remains”
I am a firm believer in the premise that everyone eventually has their heart broken by someone. It happens to all of us! But, how well we bounce back is directly related to our age, for experience is the great leveler. I am 65. Ahhh... to know what I know now, back then. I would have been a lot more hard assed and circumspect. My good wishes go with you, with the disclaimer... get tough! Lee

Gal! You should realize what is happening. If a mate sends texts complaining about your marriage, he is showing that he doesn't want to face you directly... a text is so much easier when you want to break up. People are so shallow! So often, they don't have the courage to get personal, and discuss their problems. The writing is on the wall as far as I can see...

I feel you. I am going through a divorce right now. We have no children though or assets to fight over, so for me the transition will be easier, however it is tough no matter what situation you are in. If I were you I would seek counseling first. Some may think the marriage is dead but ultimately that is up to you and him. People can be heartless when their needs are not being met. I have a friend whose husband was addicted to porn. He eventually got some help and they were able to repair their marriage but honestly it takes two to make a marriage work not one. If he loves you and honestly has a desire to change then he needs to be the one to step it up. Allow him to extend the olive branch. I know it's hard to not be angry and upset, but give him some time to go through his temper tantrum. It sounds like he is having a mid life crisis. Let him sulk for a while and from what you said it sounds like you're somewhat religious. Pray to God for strength and ability to be patient to see what happens. Also if you see it going downhill get an attorney. It's better to have someone represent you than to try and go about filing yourself.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I know exactly how you feel because it happened to me too. Plz dnt think you look dumb because I was in your shoe. We have to make mistakes to learn from them. I'm glad you're a Christian. My advice to you is to get down on your knees and pray to our Heavenly Father. I know he has better plans for you, you just have to be patient. You're going to need a lot of support from family and friends. Try to keep busy join a gym, zumba, work, or pick a new hobby and get out of the house to take your mind off of him. Start going to church if you havent already. I almost committed suicide because I didnt have anyone to turn to for support. I felt alone like no one knew the pain I was going through. Felt so lonely. Well anyways I got over if by keeping busy. I hope that helps. I hope you find someone that will treat you like a queen.

I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I know exactly how you feel because it happened to me too. Plz dnt think you look dumb because I was in your shoe. We have to make mistakes to learn from them. I'm glad you're a Christian. My advice to you is to get down on your knees and pray to our Heavenly Father. I know he has better plans for you, you just have to be patient. You're going to need a lot of support from family and friends. Try to keep busy join a gym, zumba, work, or pick a new hobby and get out of the house to take your mind off of him. Start going to church if you havent already. I almost committed suicide because I didnt have anyone to turn to for support. I felt alone like no one knew the pain I was going through. Felt so lonely. Well anyways I got over if by keeping busy. I hope that helps. I hope you find someone that will treat you like a queen.

Well fast forward to now and he filed for divorce but not final yet. I tried everything even getting him to go to counseling and he will not do it. He has no girlfriend and is living with his parents. He recently told me he stopped loving me about 1 year ago and it is so hurtful because he would always go out of his way to prove his fake "love" for me, sending flowers, writing poems, etc. He told me he has so much anger built up in him about me. I feel like I have been living a lie which basically I was. The pain is unbearable these days but I am starting to go to counseling on Monday and I have been going to church even before all of this and I am going to a DivorceCare which helps. I pray every single day multiple times. I just don't know how to stop loving him. I mean after everything he has put me through and I still love him so much! It is insane. What sucks is we still have to exchange the kids and it hurts to even see him! I have a long road ahead and I know it is a process but I am so ready to be over this nightmare. I just don't know how I will ever trust anyone again. Thanks for all of your advice and support!!