Husband Says No Lawyers Needed- But I Think He Is Lying...
My husband of 29 years has filed for divorce. He has re-connected with his high-school girlfriend over Facebook, and has already travelled to go visit her. It's obvious he plans to marry her, but he has not even completed the divorce proceedings with me.
I am writing here because I feel he is not being entirely honest with me about the divorce process. I have never been divorced before, so the process seems very complicated.
1) We have lived in the same house for 7 years, the mortgage is still being paid. The house is under BOTH our names, and my husband has been paying the mortgage. I would like the house to be put in only my name, but with him providing the money to pay for the mortgage. He told me that this cannot be done, and the house cannot be put solely in my name, because I am unemployed (that is, I have no income), and he is the one paying. Is this true? Please clear this up for me! I need to know if he is lying.
2) My husband is a government employee-- he claims that his 401(k) is only his. He says he will give me the house (?), but that I have no share in the 401(k). Is he right?
3) He says he'll be able to do the divorce all by himself, and no lawyers are neccessary. I'm not too sure about this...
Any advice, support, or suggestions are very much encouraged. Thank you!
Re: Husband Says No Lawyers Needed- But I Think He Is Lying...
Eileen: I have been divorced since 2009. My ex got his company retirement money and I got the house and alimony. He had enough money to move out. Eventually, he bought another house. The house is now in my name (was paid for at the time he filed) so I was able to stay. I would recommend at least getting a free consultation with a Lawyer. Some people just get an on-line divorce. In most States assets (401Ks, the value of the house - done by a Realtor are divided 50/50). If you are to get/keep the house, you would need either a good job and/or roommates and alimony to help pay the mortgage. It's not a good deal he's giving you a house right now you cannot pay for. Contact your local Bar Association and/or women's services center for more free legal advice. In most long term marriages, women get alimony if they have been at home or are unable to work. I also get my exes social security when he passes. It seems like he's trying to get out of this without giving you any money which is what my ex tried to do.
Re: Husband Says No Lawyers Needed- But I Think He Is Lying...
Hi,
Yes,I can understand your trauma from which you are going as you said your husband is ready with a lawyer for the divorce process and he don't need any interrruption from you. I thing you take advice from the another lawyer so that you can make your side strong during the process. Atleast you should be aware of the circumstances after divorce process,so you would not have to suffer .In case if you need some suggestion regarding the divorce process you can check this http://www.leemeierlaw.com
Re: Husband Says No Lawyers Needed- But I Think He Is Lying...
Seek legal help if you can. Money may be tight but some attorneys will represent you probono(Free). Like the others have recommended go to your local legal aid office or call the local State Bar. All good tips to lead you to a good lawyer. I don't know if he's lying but it doesn't sound like it is much to go on. Having a lawyer is good because they can walk you through the legal process and are paid to know the law. People can get divorced on their own but it can take a lot longer if not enough research is done. Having been a court clerk in the past we were told we were not allowed to give people legal advice and people would constantly ask us how to file for divorce. The courts often have self help websites with instructions on the laws and legal forms you can file, but legally the court cannot tell you what to do. Research will need to be done on your local state laws. I would also seek an attorney, as suggested previously.