I have been divorced for 5 years now and I'm still not ok emotionally. I thought I was doing rather well until he had a baby with his latest girlfriend. That has seemed to bring up a lot of issues that I thought I was over. I didn't want a divorce in the first place. That was his choice after he decided he wanted to be free and date again. And now he is giving her the life that was promised to me. Another baby, vacations, sending her back to school. You name it and she now has it. I am trying to not let it upset me but it does. As I struggle with 3 kids that he rarely sees, he is out there living the life that I had always dreamed of for him and I. Now don't get me wrong, I DO NOT WANT HIM BACK! But I also don't want to fwel like I never mattered to him. Like our marriage was just a dress rehearsal preparing him to be the husband he should have been all along. I hate feelimg this way.
I think i know what you are feeling. I have been married for 5 years now, and am in the process of divorce. I am so angry and sad all the time, not because i still love him but because he took everything from me. we had a dream, dreams about what our life was supposed to be, but he is going to start over with someone else.
Becky: I have been divorced for 8 years. I do not want a divorce, however, it had not been a happy marriage for 10 yrs. (he was never home, long story) and I also do not want him back. He moved across the country and got a girlfriend before our final court date (the courts frown on that). My Lawyer told me not to get involved in his personal life (his life with his girlfriend). He moved 2 hours away from her. Your ex may eventually leave the woman he's with also to move on. Good luck to my ex's gf and yours, they will need it!
Becky,
I was divorced last year after 25 years of marriage and now my EX is planning a wedding with the woman he left me for next year. I understand how you are feeling about the other woman having the life you planned for yourself, I fell that way sometimes also and I understand that even though you are upset about the situation, you don't want him back. One thing I have done for myself is to write a list of things i want to do and activities I want to participate in. They could be little things like take more bubble baths. Post your list so its what you focus on. The funnest part about my EX was when he asked me if I would come to his wedding (he was serious).
Becky,
I responded to your post a week or two back and during that time I had not had your feelings towards my ex until I found out he was taking a trip out of the country with his girlfriend. I became so angry because I wanted to travel out of the country and he refused. I totally understand your feelings of not wanting him back but having some feelings about what is happening now.
I know what you mean about the ex going places and doing stuff with the new wife. WK (my ex) and his current wife (whom I have dubbed The Beast, for her disposition and manner) have gone all manner of places, including long weekends out of state, which WK and I could never afford to do because we had young children and no money, LOL.