Hi, my ex and I have shared legal custody of our 3 year old. I am the Custodial and residential parent. Our custody schedule rotates as he is a shift worker. She had been enrolled in daycare for the past year two flip flopping days a week only during my time as he has not needed child care. Now she is 3 and moving up to PreK. The director has stated very clearly that she seems to be having trouble with the change and would really benefit from a consistent 2-3 day schedule on the same days per week. Right now they are all over the place around his schedule. He said no. He says it's more important for her to spend time with him vs attend PreK on his time if it happened to fall on his day(s) and that PreK is not mandatory. He wants to pull her out of that school and find another that will accommodate his schedule and allow us to flip flop as needed. I'm livid. It's selfish and is avoiding giving her a routine.
Thoughts??

Marilyn: This is a good question for a Family Lawyer if you want to change things for the child.

I think your ex is right. Time with a parent trumps time with a babysitter anyday.

Regardless of who is right, you have nowhere to go with this. Your ex is fully in control of what he does with the child on his days.

This is not a life or death decision. I suggest you let it go.

So pre-school is a babysitter? I beg to differ.

Yes,
Pre-school is LARGELY a babysitter. I will grant that there is some benefit to socialization and learning to function in a school-like setting.

But it doesn't matter if you agree. You have no control over your ex-husband's actions with the child on his time. You are better off gracefully dropping the matter rather than making yourself look like a control freak.