Frankie: The fact that he will not seek counseling indicates to me that he, too, has checked out of the marriage. My parents divorced when I was a teen. My ex left after our daughter turned 18 at the 21 year mark of our marriage. I was heartbroken as a teen, also, but time heals. I would sit down with the kid(s) (call a family meeting) and tell them (with or without your husband) that you are not happy. There is a lot at stake in a long term marriage like the house (which may be ordered sold), retirement and assets. I recommend you visit a Family Lawyer for a consultation. Sometimes the first visit is free.

I went through the same thing. I was married for many years but I was not happy My parents loved him but there was nothing between us. we never talked or went anywhere. Despite what my friends and family thought I needed to do what was best for me. I did not want to wake up in 10 years having wasted any more time. It was scary and honestly I struggled but I am now the happiest I have ever been.