I've dealt with depression, too, although it sounds like you've had it really bad. I would suggest that you be selfish and go see a therapist for yourself, /before/ you make any big life changes. Maybe you've done so in the past and it hasn't worked, but I think you should try again. This situation is different, and a therapist could help you talk out your choices and help you make a solid decision. This isn't something you can just take the advice of a stranger about. It will have to be your decision and talking about all the pros and cons might help. Plus, there may be new treatment options for your condition that you could consider. I know how overwhelming it is and I so despise using the phone when I'm depressed, so I know what I'm asking from you as a depressed person. I just think that you deserve to be well, and that you should be well before making such a critical decision. Remember, though, that you could always leave later, or you can always come back. Neither decision has to be permanent, and you could decide that you'll make the decision in a year, or six months, or next month.... Best of luck!