Active duty husband announced a divorce on Dec 13th , 5 days before my birthday. Been married 5 years and he's had some issues with having a emotional affair 2 years ago. We moved overseas just over 2 years ago because he's active duty. That's when I saw a huge change in him. Classic signs of depression. He says that there is no fixing this, that he's done.I'm literally heart broken. We've fought a lot while being here. Idk what to do. He started saying awful things when he left me like he's never loved me ,I was a mistake etc. He even grabbed some cloths and moved to a supposed friends house. I was alone on my birthday and now christmas. All the friends I had here have shut me out because their husband's work with him and have taken his side. My only support is back in the states and it's going to take a couple months to even have the paperwork to move myself and household goods back to there. I can't stop going through a wheel of emotions, anger, sadness, hopelessness, grief nor can I control them. It just keeps spinning. I pray he will see the light and reconsider. He's refused to go to marriage counseling for 2 years and says now he won't go either because he's absolutely done with me. Idk what to Do. They say absence makes the heart grow founder but I've lost hope. He has just under 2 years left at this base before he either gets out or realists tongontonthe next base. I haven't been able to picture my life without him. I'm 29 he's 25. Sorry for the long post , I just need to vent.

Sally: Sorry about this. It seems to me you are better off without him. I hope you have a Lawyer.

I feel like you are my situational twin at the moment. Mine woke up on Friday (two days before Xmas) and just blurted it out. Says he's done with me and the kids and he just wants single airman life back. I didn't handle it well and he's now out of the house. I just couldn't look at him when he started being nasty to me. I am debating going back to the states or trying to get to the bottom of why this is happening. We talked to the chaplain who wants him to seek mental health services but he refuses. It's so out of the blue that the bloody chaplain thinks he's crazy too. He even admitted he knows it's crazy but maintains that it's what he wants. I've been scouring the internet these pass few days grasping at anything to make sense of this.

Yes we are overseas as well. The counselor said their was hope but he also refuses any type of help. Says he's made his mind up and even moved in with a friend. We don't have children (big stress. I have pcos a infertility diesease) but we have 3 dogs who have been acting out and upset since he's left. We haven't even filed the seperation paperwork yet so that he can file the early return of dependents so I can go live in the states with his parents (they have disowned him during this since he's got mental issues) I have to even rehome my youngest dog since his parents said I can only bring 2 :( I have no one here at our base. All our mutual friends shunned me like I have the plague. I'm literally alone here with no one that knows what I'm going through (stationed in germany)