Hi guys,
I am dating a guy I knew many years ago (15 to be exact), we dated briefly back then, but wasnt the right timing. Well fast forward 15 years and he's finally got divorced a month ago, but had been separated for 2 years. I reconnected with him a year ago. He has a 6 year okd daughter. The daughter lives with her mom, and for 2 years she doesnt know her parents were separated/and now divorced. He says they never used the word divorced and that the daughter thinks that they just live apart because they fight too much. We miss alot of time together because when his daughter is around on his days, I am not allowed to be with him. Not even in a group social situatiin. He does not even want to introduce me as a friend of the family. Recently I said this is impacting our time togther and maybe I could be included more by just being around his family, ( I go over there when he does not have her). He wont say he has a girlfriend because it will ruin her "psyche" So I suggested that just having me around so at least she knows me. He said no she will catch on. I said even if I dont act like a girlfriend? And he said well no then its all fake and he doesnt want to do it and he does not want to be pressured.
I told him , Im not sure how we can move on in this relationship if we are not going to be able to be together on holidays, birthdays, etc.
He thinks we can have a full relationship without meeting his daughter for a "while". Btw I have 3 children, 2 are older and my youngest is 9. I even suggested playdates with my daughter and he said no way.


Has anyone had a similar situation happen to them and what did you do?

DivorcedinNY: I have known people who dated divorced people with kids and if things were going really well, they introduced them to the new girlfriend/boyfriend. My mom and Dad were divorced. Some of the people they dated I already knew. It seems like he's in denial of the divorce for the sake of his daughter. As she gets older, she will probably become angry because they were not honest with her about having been divorced. Sometimes the moms of the children on this forum do not want the ex's girlfriend to meet the kids/spend time with them. I think you are not being treated well in this situation and it is all about them pretending to still be a family for the sake of the child. You decide how long you want to wait for him, it was a while before my boyfriend introduced me to his family, but him keeping you away from his family too much longer is not a good sign that he has good, long term intentions toward you. This sounds like a mess. If you are not happy, I would end it and move on. He sounds like a person who is very inconsiderate of your feelings. If he is concerned about her ability to cope with the divorce, he should bring her to counseling.