I am experiencing a similar situation. Just posted about it. I don't understand why husbands act so nasty when it comes to separation or divorce. I'm not asking for any child support money, all I want is for us to co-parent in peace. Mine is making my like miserable and I cannot wait to sign this lease!!
I hope this post does not come to late... Your sound like a great mom. I had a similar conversation today with my daughter- I told her I loved her and I am doing what is best for all of us long term. It may be hard but she will always have two parents that love her and will be there for her always. It is not her fault - sometimes people care about each other but can't live together.
I know my daughter saw our unhappiness and it hurt her to see us hurt each other. I like to think I am teaching her that happiness is important and each of us deserves it and can attain it if we are brave enough. Divorce takes courage - especially as a mother who is always trying to put others before herself. Your happiness will give her more happiness. She will see a mother who values herself and hopefully this translates into her valuing herself.
I personally- am in a similar situation- I have been married 22 years am on the brink of asking my husband for divorce. I am trying to muster up this courage I speak of because I really believe it is true. I stayed for soooo long because I thought I was doing the right thing for my kids. I heard my daughter tell her firend the other day that "My parents hate each other so much -I can't stand it" What a wake up call- I was wrong- kids know...
I wish you the best of luck- Please let me know what happens.