I live in MA. The financial assets are divided 50/50 here so no matter what Lawyer you have, you have to abide by that since that is the system here. In my case, it was a long term marriage. If the marriage was short........it's an easier situation. Check the laws on line to see what the laws are in MA. If you are involved in a long term marriage, the following are going to be an issue: who gets the house/will it be sold/can the person who may be getting the house afford to take care of it? Retirement, who gets what? the kids/visitation/child support/who is going to help pay for college? Alimony laws in MA have changed. Lifetime alimony is rare unless the person is unable to work/older/was a long-term stay-at-home mom (the employability of the spouse is a big factor). If he has a good Lawyer, he can stall the alimony like mine did. I had to go to the Food Pantry. My Dad paid for my Lawyer. If he has abused you or you are very low income, you may be able to get limited free legal assistance. Check on line. They all get mad if they are going to be out some money. The biggest issue for me in the divorce was financial also. If you are not working and are able to work, his Lawyer will expect you to go back to work. If you have kids, a Family Lawyer is best. Lawyers help with finances. You have to reveal your financial situation and so does he. It is called "discovery" in MA. You may not live close to my Lawyer if you are not over 25 miles northeast of Boston. The Lawyers have to follow the law. Your Lawyer will talk to his Lawyer if he gets one. You do not have to talk to him excessively as the Lawyer will lead the way in trying to get you what you need. If you have a local women's services center, they may be able to help you. Get whatever help you need to survive. I went to free suppers for a while. He did not give me any money for food.

Oh Lara, my heart aches for you. I hope things get better. You are in my prayers. I'm hoping my husband doesn't lead me too far down that road. I do have a full time job so i will be able to support myself in some sense at least. My situation just unfolded last week so I'm angry with him and scared about the future at the same time. Thank you for all the information. It gives me some peace of mind we should be able to at least divvy things up 50/50. Take care!