I have been with my husband for 9 years and married for over 2. We both said we never wanted to get married (we both have been married before), but one day we just went for it. Since we did, it has gone down hill. We were rarely intimate, maybe once every 4 months. He said he is just not interested in sex anymore. He became increasingly violent when he drank to the point I have received a black eye, he has dragged me out of the car and left me in the middle of nowhere at 1 in the morning. I divorced my first husband for doing the same things. I moved out 4 months ago because he got drunk, blacked out and thought he beat me up and left me in a ditch. (he punched a wall and his knuckles were bloody) He also said horrible things to me. Because of this, I have completely lost all love for him.
I love him for who he was and for adopting my son (who is 16), but I am not in love with him. Granted, he has not had a drink since the incident 4 months ago, but I can not forgive him for the things he did to me. He has been trying to win me back. I have gone on one date with him, but looking at him honestly hurts.
We tried marriage counseling, in which she suggested he find personal counseling for his anger. He refuses and says he doesn't need it. I have told him I don't love him anymore, but he won't listen. He is determined to "win" me back. Now, he wants to take me on a date this weekend.
How do I tell him to leave me alone. My son (16) decided to stay with him because of school, so I am obviously in touch with him because of my son, but I don't want anything else to do with him.
My BIG concern here is that your 16yr old son is living with a drunken abuser??! What an example your son has? Hopefully, your son does not repeat the actions of your husband.
As for you, this situation sounds like you're on the verge of being killed by your abuser. It's very scary. I would be involving police and getting a restraining order. If you have to...move far far away from this man.