I've been divorced for three years. For two year I have been living in Kansas with my ex-husband's permission. I homeschool our three children and they travel back and forth between states every 6 -10 weeks. Ex has never paid child support and is now taking me to court to get full custody stating he wants the children in public school. Of course, he also now wants me to pay him child support (and for it to be retroactive, along with his court costs).
My new husband and I have been living in Kansas two years and also have a son that the children have know his whole life and they are all very close. IT feels very unjust and not "in the child's best interest" but I fear because of homeschooling never being in favor I could lose to him. I feel I have their best interests at heart because I want them to continue to have a relationship with their father and he wants to cut me out of their lives.
Has anyone been in a similar situation and it turned out favorably? It's so stressful going through this.
Kimberly: My ex wanted to take our 18 yr. old full-time college student away from me and give me visitation, lol, even though there was no reason for this - wanted to move her an hour away into a tiny apt. They all get mad, also, when it is about money. He knows his child support debt will catch up with him, and, he knows if he gets custody he will not only not have to pay, but also, be in control. Most custody arrangements today are 50/50 with one ex with visitation, alternating holidays, etc. Why not have the kids stay with him for school/summer vacations. All of this needs to go back to court. If you are open to my advice, please go back to the Lawyer you had (if you had one) or consult with a Family Lawyer where you live. They are best where there are kids concerned. Yes, I agree, this is stressful, but with a good Lawyer and a good Judge, justice prevails.
Hi. Try consulting a lawyer. Recently, I had some legal issues and I found on Yelp about the lawyer Bechara Tarabay. You also need to get in touch with a lawyer soon.
Technically, he has a right to challenge you for custody and for child support. A judge will likely have to make a ruling. But odds are very good in your favor because courts are heavily gender biased in favor of women and almost always give women primary custody and the chunk of his paycheck that comes with that. Homeschooling, as long as you are square with the state agency that monitors that, won't be an issue. Slightly more than 80% of the time, women win primary custody. As a woman, you generally have to be in jail, a non-recovered druggie, or a convicted child abuser in order to not win primary custody from a man. Enjoy your court-room advantage if you want to use that type of leverage against your children's father.
Now, if you were TRULY interested in the children's best interest, you'd figure out how to share parenting time 50:50 and accept that neither of you should lay claim to any of the other's paycheck. If that happened, the children would be much happier and healthier. You might not like hearing that, but all the reputable, unbiased child psychologists will tell you that.