My ex and I have been separated for quite some time. Over 8 years of marriage -- he had multiple affairs. We separated on poor terms -- I left the house for my own sanity, and he refused to pay any support for our three kids. Now, after all that mess - the GAL, the home visits, the thousands of dollars in attorney fees, we reach an agreement in mediation.
I literally told my mediator, I'll give anything but my children, just to be done. I want rid of him. So we settle out. I forgive his CS arrearages, I lower his support, change is visitation schedule, give him the house with all the equity, and sign on to let the flavor of the month (well, 8) do all his pick ups and drop offs. I walked away with a terrible taste in my mouth, but so thankful it was done.
Today, I am in a fantastic relationship of two years, and my fiancé has a fantastic new job offer -- on the other side of the country. Financially, it's a dream. So I do what my agreement requires -- I send my ex a notification of intent. Now, he's telling me I cannot leave with "his" children - even though when we started looking he knew -- and that the only time he told our GAL that "it was okay for me to leave" was if I left the children.
All I hear about is how he will miss out on them growing up. When he's never here to begin with. I feel like dirt. And don't know which way is up. It's starting to impact my relationship. I'm afraid to turn in my notice. My attorney is not being very informative. I don't even know what to do. So I'm writing here.
Is it normal, to give and give and give and give --- and still feel this bad?
He has a very good case for a custody change. You can move anywhere you like, but the residence of your children is under the jurisdiction of the court.