Tis the season to not be merry. I am wondering if I am alone through this process. You feel like No one understands what you are going through. I am that person that has been there for everyone and I don't see one person knocking on my door to offer a shoulder or to see if I am okay. My husband and I have been together 6 years married 2 and we bought our first house last year. We had a rough patch the last year. The intimacy stopped and i felt alone. For years i was the one who did all the finances and it was A lot. We never had a sex life and I told myself that was not needed in my relationship. In April on our 2 year anniversary my husband drank to much and I had to get my own room in Cozumel. I have been talking to work friend and our relationship advanced. I knew at that point where i have never cheated before I was looking for someone to walk beside me. I filed for divorce after Mediation and during that process I lost my job of 18 years. I could not keep up with the lawyer and my job. Bills were not getting paid and here I sit in my house still wondering what happened. I am moving out next week and we both agree we need to move forward with our lives. I just can't believe all this happened to me in such a short time. I was just told last week my Cat has cancer and has a couple weeks life. The news is unbearable and I feel alone and miserable when I am the one who started this disaster. How do you see the light at the end of the tunnel?

Ami: Get whatever help you need. See if there is a women's services center nearby. Visit your local food pantry, if needed. See if there is anyone at the Bar Association who can finish your case for free "pro bono" since you lost your job. Look for work on line and/or visit your local Unemployment office. Perhaps you can find a responsible roommate to help ease the finances. You will probably have to sell the house and split any money you make on it with your husband.

Thanks for the advice!! How do you get notified on this when you receive a response? I will say to anyone going through this remove yourself from social media. I love instagram you can filter what you need to see and you don’t have to relieve the pain on fb with memories!

You are not alone, I left my husband in September, but like you I was out of the relationship a long time ago. I don't have a job, I was laid off in 2015, so I am now in school with a government program, but at the end of this semester, I'll be done and out of money. My husband drinks to the point of ridiculous and was verbally abusive for many years. The worst is that I still care about him. I also like you did all the finances and for several years was the sole bread winner of the house. I did all the cleaning all the finances and there was no intimacy. It was like living with a really bad room mate.

How are you doing now? It is a really bad roomate. I am living alone now and the cat is still living. Can’t bekieve it. She is my strength through this. Pretty sad that a 4 legged cat brings you comfort. I feel like i ended up like that crazy cat lady alone and talking to an animal lol

You are definitely not the only one who feels alone. I'm sorry about your cat. My cat was my baby and he died in my arms in May just two weeks after my grandmother died. My husband cheated on me most of last year with a man and now I'm going through a divorce. What's worse is that even though we are separated, we are still living in the same house. Don't give up. Fight for what is yours. I understand you have lost your job but don't let him get what he wants and you be without.

How are things going now? Did you move out? I left in February. Probably the hardest thing i have done. Being alone for the first time is so hard. You can’t seem to process the emotion and still drive by your condo. I went for my first interview. Starting to get out there but it’s not easy. That is the worst living together during the separation. I found things that pained me in so many ways. Here i sit still crying and it’s been a year process.

Ami: Sorry all this happened. My ex moved across the country back in 2009 and our daughter also moved far away to college and it was just me and the cat for 2 years. I was lucky to have met someone two years after the divorce, while my cat was dying and I had to put her to sleep (which cost hundreds of dollars adding to my credit card debt), I was sobbing. It took a while for my finances to improve and to be up to getting another cat. I hope you find a job soon and can get back to having a Lawyer/divorce and to have a better life. It takes a couple of years to move on emotionally from a divorce for most. Best wishes.