I am so sorry and its very scary and confusing. :( I am not sure what state you are in but everyone is telling me to file a legal separation to protect my rights?? Scares me cause I know he will flip but I think we also have to look after us since noone else will. Check on line what your state says he is obligated to take care of. After being together so long you have many rights. Sorry this is very difficult. Thank god we have this site for each other.

Completely Lost,

Going after his finances will not make you happy, or satisfied. That's not the point. The point is to give you the material support you need to put your life back together. As for the bills, do you have his social? Call up the numbers on each invoice, and give them your husband's new address. Make sure any collections agents who get the case have his new info.

Although I have to admit, I look forward to making her sign that check every month. Maybe she was never grateful for the support I gave her, for making her dreams my dreams. Maybe never will be grateful. But she will show it anyway, every 25th of every month.

Mostly though, I am just sad. Unfortunately love is not a light switch. As strong as I feel now, I know I would break in her presence.

I hear you. Its so sad I call my husband to bring his bills to him just so I have a minute to see him. :( He totally hugs me like he cares but he is so stubborn and says he can't change how he feels. Its cause he isn't trying nor does he want to. The whole thing is so weird for me. He said he would call me to do lunch. I don't know if this is a bad idea but I told him just think about taking baby steps to work on us our marriage??? Should I not call him for 2 weeks see what happens? Thanks for advise

Here's the question I wish I had asked myself years ago: if I had tried to leave, would she have tried to stop me?

Does that mean I should let go and see..?
Went out tonight for the first time in a while with a single friend. uck it made me sick to my stomach. I can't bear to take off my ring although we are separated and when men come and talk with us I just want to scream go away. Just venting its all so weird and scary. I love and miss my husband I know I don't need him to survive but I want him back as the best friend he always was. This all seems like a horrible nightmare. :( I just keep praying and believing in God my faith to lead me... I went to a support group at church yesterday and I am so proud I had the courage to go. It was nice to be around people who understand but at the end of the night I felt guilty because I also wanted to run out of the room because listening to so many sad stories was making me feel week. I am just week right now and sometimes breakable that I feel like I need positive every day all day or I will not be able to cope. Before I could handle anything but now I cant even watch a sad movie.