I only wish my ex would have cheated when he was in the military.
When I was in NY my friend caught her ex cheating, phone records and such. She reported him to his officer in charge. She gets over half of his pay (alimony) he was lucky he was allowed to keep his rank. They do not want or need bad raps. They side with the wife.
Now I am entitled to a % of his retirement he gets now. He get med. retirement from the VA and I am fighting to get my % of it now.

Thanks for the advice ladies. I am so so tired of fighting with him over his "addiction" with online porn, dating websites, etc. Everything that comes out of his mouth is a lie.
What concerns me is that when I talked to his sister (she is two years younger than him), she said as children she remembered him being "innapropriate" with her. He never molested her, but she said he would hold her down against her will and tickle or or spank her even when she told him she didn't want him to. Also she remembers him stealing her panties a couple times...and his parents busted him for making 900 number calls at 11 years old...why in the world they wouldn't warn me of this BEFORE I married him I have no idea.
Maybe if push came to shove (I have proof of the online stuff) she could testify to his nature and in combination with recent stuff perhaps this would persuade a judge to put off any over night visits for awhile...I am being as kind as possible to him and he has agreed to giving me full custody once we file for divorce, but he could change his mind who knows.
I am just praying he would never hurt our baby. I am never leaving him alone with her. Wish me luck.

If you could get his sister and mother to go to court with you and tell them there concerns that would definately give you the upper hand. Also if he is doing on line porn/dating and paying for it try to get copies of his statements or some kind of proof that he is doing this. All this info will definately help u in court. Good luck