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dealing with a controlling/ manipulative soon to be ex

I am have been separated from my husband for 6 months and live with my parents. I am tired of him making my life hell. I am tight on money to even be able to hire a lawyer. I am currently paying our house in Which he lives in And all other bills. There's no way I could even start this divorce without having extra money. I don't trust my husband. He has offered to go with just his lawyer, to get a divorce. My husband has clearly stated he does not want to pay child support, and that he wants our house because he earned it, keep in mind that I have 2 little boys, ages 2 and 4. I know and feel that my ex wants to screw me over. I have asked him to refinance the house under his name only, but he won't , just to make it harder for me to get a place of my own. He refuses to give me the divorce, and he takes advantage that I can't just hire a lawyer without any money . What can I do in my situation? my husband accuses me of cheating, lying. he constantly call me a ***** .

Re: dealing with a controlling/ manipulative soon to be ex

First of all, I truly believe that when somebody accuses another of cheating, they're probably doing it themselves. What state do you live in? Do you both have jobs? If your name wasn't on the mortgage of your marital house, would you qualify for a loan? I ask these questions because if he is the primary bread winner, then many states require payment of child support to the parent with residential custody. Sounds like you really need an attorney..ASAP. My attorney accepts credit cards. I wonder if you'd be able to aquire an interest free credit card just to get the ball rolling. Maybe you could use that card to pay a retainer fee....just a thought. If you could retain a lawyer, he/she would be able to advise you how to handle the mortgage situation. Since you are paying for the mortgage...who knows...the court might order HIM to move out.

Good luck! Keep us posted.

Re: dealing with a controlling/ manipulative soon to be ex

Best thing I did was to get a good attorney. My picture still doesn't look too rosy, but much better than it would have otherwise. My stbx is also very controlling and manipulative and he, too, thought we could do this with one attorney-HIS! I was fortunate in that my dad offered to pay the retainer fee for my attorney. Shop around, some will take payments.

So what happens if you don't pay the mortgage? Is his name on it, too? I'm at the point that my credit is so shot (thanks a lot X) that it really doesn't matter much if I pay my mortgage or not. I'll lose the house anyway. I didn't pay it this month 'cause my stbx has paid NOTHING this month, and my attorney is hot after my X for that payment. He believes a judge will rule in my favor if we have to go that route.

Get an attorney one way or another. Good luck. Let us know how it's going for you.