I'm not perfect... I try my best to be a great mom! To be a good student and a good person. I don't do a lot of things right as hard as I may try. That's just me I guess...I'll never be the person who seems to have it all together. I always realize my mistakes though. I always try to do better. I'm getting there!

I guess a lot of my faults come from a never ending depression and low self esteem. Again I'm getting better. I had my daughter young. I started off rocky but now we have the best relationship! She's everything to me and I tell her everyday! School is going great too! Dean's list every term so far! Yes me...unbelievable!!

My husband...He had a rough life growing up. Abusive father, mother passed when he was just a baby. I understand. I've tried more than anyone to let him know how much I care...To help. Because of his horrible child issues, he now has serious anger issues. He can't talk things through...can't get into a fight without a very good chance he'll flip out. Nine and a half years we've been together. He's been violent. I keep wanting to defend him. I was just about to say nothing too bad. Let's say the last time was bad enought that my daughter who was 3 at the time remembers and he could have hurt both of us. She'll never forget.

This mornings fight is why I'm writing all of this. We were running late to get my daughter to school. One of those mornings where you have twenty minutes to get out the door on time. I got her ready in time, she was in a great mood! My husband doesn't feel the need to help me out most mornings. He doesn't help out with alot... but he's usually atleast ready so we can both drive her to school. Her and I are ready to walk out the door in a hurry...and he's not dressed. I wasn't really upset...I'm use to him doing things like that. I just wanted to get out the door. He TELL'S me to wait. Something like I'll wait and I'll like it...or I'll be sorry. =/ So we hurry out the door before he can stop us and I did get her there on time. I come back and he keeps it going. In a nutshell he wound up pointing his finger in my face a few times ordering (yes came across as an order) around, locked me out of the house, took my keys, oh and shot our tv with a bb gun!!

I told him not to come home. He didn't. Only night one and my daughter already cried for him. I told her I don't want her to have to see us fight anymore. It's not ok!! He's a good dad to her...but only sometimes. He isn't the same kind of parent as I am.

I could keep going....I'll stop. Someone anyone tell me what you think! BE COMPLETELY HONEST...I don't have anyone to talk to about this with

Sounds like history repeating itself. If you can, get out of there or make him leave. Require that he seek extensive counseling or he is not to come back. This problem will not go away on its own. I might add...pray, pray, pray. It helps!

In our area, we have a place called Turning Point. It's for people who are in an abusive relationship. If you have such a place, they can talk to you about your situation and give help where needed. It sounds like he is an abuser and his violence is escalating.

All I can say it I left my husband when he acted in such a way. I still deal with the issues even after leaving but it is better then dealing with HIM. You are better off telling him that he needs to seek help for his anger issues. It is NOT okay for a GROWN ADULT (and I'm putting adult in place of another A word I would like to use) MAN to act like a 10 year old and shoot your TV with a BB gun or lock a woman out of her own house. If he will not seek the help he needs change your locks or move. It is not a healthy environment of you or your child to witness this. The reason I left my situation is because I did not want my child to think it was normal to be that way with their family and spouse. I know it will hurt, I know you want to look beyond it and like you said defend his actions but there is NO EXCUSE for his behavior.

That sounds like a frightening situation. I think the idea of seeing if your community has a program for abused women is a good idea. In our community it is called Children's Inn. I also think Jean has a great idea...pray, pray, pray. Keep us posted.

Change the locks, get a PFA and seeks full custody of your daughter.
It is hard when your child cried for Daddy. :( but like it was said before. YOu don't want her thinking it is okay for a man to act that way. If you stay and it continues then she will think that a woman is just supposed to deal with whatever a man wants..it's unsafe.
Think of you and your child when you make this decision.

RUN...I put up with that(verbal abuse) for too many yrs. to me and kids.They never change, they dont get better I kept hoping and praying for that, looking for help. It never happened. Then he filed for divorce, and told everyone we knew incredible lies about me and our children. All because of his personal insecurities. Now he is losing everything he worked for, but most of all the love of his children.
I stayed in the house, told him not to come home.
Good luck, you deserve better so does your little girl.

Trish what you are going through is something that many of us had. You are not alone and this is not your fault. You fell in love with a man and had a child with him because you at one point felt that was the right steps to take. Well now you know that his actions are speaking louder than his words and you have to take the right steps to leave, go and get out of the house. If you have no place to go then change the locks they are cheap at Home Depot call the police and let them know that you are in fear for yourself and your chid and they will put you on the right path. I wonder Trish if a friend of yours came to you with this problem what would you tell her to do ? Would you tell her to leave or would you tell her that she must of done something to set him off. I think that you would tell her to leave and that Is what I can see what most of us are telling you. He needs help that you can not give him, Now most men refuse to do it, well then he can be alone and should be alone until he decideds to get help. I also agree with the other response that you have to think about your daughter, my gosh he locked you out of the house.. he used a weapon at the t.v yeah it is a B B gun but it is still a weapon . Your daughter should not have to see and hear the abuse because you refuse to take the first step.. Please think of her and yourself. Who care's about him. Ok I know you do but I know in your heart you know your should leave . God bless