Add me to the list. Tried for 20 years. Some marriages can't be saved and some marriages aren't worth saving. It's important to be able to recognize this and know when letting go is the healthiest thing to do.

I tried as well. But like Sue if I could pick the one moment I should have left it would have been the night my ex needed to rid himself of his guilt and told me he cheated ( with the woman he is with now) That was almost 9 years ago, I was 5 months pregnant with our first child and going through a horrible time ( my cousin/bf was murdered a week before, he always did have good timing) What a fool I was thinking he would never cheat again....
Most of us posting here are going through divorce because either we or our ex's are done. 9 times out of 10 it's to late. A post like this should be on it's very own forum A "I want to save my marriage" forum. Here it just adds insult to injury.

This is instrumental for people who have no valid reason to divorce I think. Maybe for those who just arent seeing eye-to-eye or having a communication breakdown. I dont think this works for people like myself who have a (ex)husband who is a habitual liar and constantly says he will change and grow and then never does. Its not for the wife that has give 110% only to get spat on (metaphorically speaking). If the husband/wife just does NOT want it to work, then you can try all you want...as I did...and the only response from him was "I have to get it when I get it....I have to want it for myself....I'll grow when I need to".... I have been used for everything from money to sex to knowledge. I have shed blood, sweat, tears, and more tears. The greatest part about it is that I have only been married for 3 YEARS (in Feb). I am exhausted from "fighting for my marriage" all alone, while he does what he wants to do.....apologizes, and then a week or two or three later we are RIGHT BACK to where we were the weeks prior with NO significant change or concern about my feelings or well being. I was NEVER priority and competed with everything and everyone. SO....I say all this to say (sorry for the wordiness) that it really DOES have to be acquiesced between BOTH parties.