Funny thing-I have always HATED change. Through the proces of living with a jerk, having Jerk leave me and going through the divorce I have really learned to go with the flow, be flexible, and even be spontaneous at times. I am living in limbo right now...nothing predictable here, but I'm OK. Don't know for sure what the relevance was of this to this thread, but ctwc's post took my brain in that direction.

Thanks ladies as always. I get to see things through other people eyes and my eyes get wider and wider. Thanks. I know my life right now might not be what I really wanted for me and my kids, but I have faith that one day we will be there, and we will be happy. I do believe what goes around, comes around. or something like that, and I know the flea will pay for everything he did to me and my kids and he will be sorry and it will be too late for everything. Don't get me wrong I do not wish anything bad on him but just a little pay back would be good for humility.

Even Christ said, "You are either for me or against me." He knows selfish people like to live on the middle line and hop back and forth to where ever they want....Marriage is the same way...once they hop those lines it is so much easier the next time. Trust is a hard thing to gain back once you give it away to something or someone else.

Susan

Once trust has been lost can it ever be FULLY reovered? I can think back to a few white lies I caught Jerk in early on, and I don't think I ever FULLY trusted him after that. I didn't realize that at the time, but looking back when he spoke I always wondered...

Becky, I think there are some cases where someone can change or we would have a world full of liars, but I think the betrayer really has to have a true change of heart and really put their all into breaking the habit of lies and betrayals. I have seen people change, but I have also seen people like my ex who say they want to change, but never really do because deep down they are content in lying to get what they want. My ex never really tried to make things work when he asked to come back. I think the deeper someone falls into lying, the harder if ever that they can pull themselves out. In the Bible God says he hates lies and that the devil is the father of liars. God knows how lies can spread and destroy lives, marriages, families etc like a in-festive disease. Lies grow, spread and destroy and also becomes habitual.

Susan