Hi Lisa,
I completely understand second guessing yourself. I was the one that left, am in a new relationship and also have teenage daughters. Sometimes I feel like I wrecked the kids lives and am ridden with guilt. It sounds like you are doing good today though :) I am having a good day too! It's like emotional storms brew up, but just like the weather...this too shall pass. Hang in there!
Tammy

Funny you should say that "This to shall pass" My Momma tells me that every time I am having a bad day. Be it with the divorce, the kids or anything else that is going on in my life. Today would have been our anniversary and really there is no emotion about it...just another day. I guess my moment of weakness has passed, Thank God

OK, so I didn't leave the marriage voluntarily, but I'm going to chime in anyway.

I believe it is VERY normal to mourn on this day. Think of all of the hopes and dreams your wedding day held. Did you used to do special things on your anniversary that made this day even more special to you? Just because you knew you couldn't or shouldn't be married to him anymore doesn't mean the emotions evaporate into thin air.

For me, my anniversary was always a disappointment. I'd plan things for us to do and he'd find a way to destroy it. I learned to HATE our anniversary. He informed me a couple of years ago of how awful our wedding day was, too. I thought it was beautiful and worked very hard to plan a special day for us. I paid for it myself-worked a second job to do it. So the memories of that are tainted as well. At this moment I don't mourn anything about Jerk. I'm sure when I can quit living in survival mode and my life is a little more settled I'll have the time to think of happier days. For now, those happier days don't even exist in my memory.