I would be a bit skeptical about your husbands intentions. Perhaps the OW left him. He seems emotionally detached from your son's feelings as well as yours. I question whether he deserves your loyalty. He's at Peace, well good for him!!! How about the trail of disrespect, infidelity & abandonment. He certainly didn't think about your peace of mind.
I hope you can really focus on yourself & do anything & everything that will contribute to your sense of self as a strong, confident woman.

LonelyOne you are in my prayers more than ever. I feel that I know you and understand you so well. Your last comment about the pain of living under the same roof with him as roommates being too painful to bear has come from my mouth so many times. I will be with you in spirit tomorrow when he returns, I have been in your shoes 7 times, waiting hopefully for my much loved husband's return, and it will soon be 8 times. I will pray for the return you want, for all to go well. Be careful LonelyOne, I have learned that sometimes when we hope so much it is so very easy to misread anything. But I have also learned that sometimes what we think we see is real.