I will. Let me know too please. My lawyer says he has seen where the judges have given 50% or around that of VA and SSI to the spouse. I just pray he is right. After all, hes the one that took off, not me. He needs to suffer like he is making the family suffer.

I just had my mediation and my lawyer said that my soon ex VA and SS benefits are only for him. She able to ask for the spousal support.

I don't know much about the law. So I am hoping that my lawyer knows what she is doing. I hope I don't regret later.

I'm of no help on the VA and disability stuff, but I will comment on the attorney. I have a male attorney and am very happy with him. When he found out what Jerk tried to pull it made him angry. When we sat down with Jerk I believe having a male was an advantage, because Jerk acted differently (much less of a jerk) around the male than he would have a female.

I say be careful, lawyers will say what you want to hear to make the money...I was promised 1/2 & more but when it comes down to it, I will not get 1/2 but a decent amount though...I have given that lawyer a fortune in fees which I feel that is all he wanted...Promise they got to sale their words to win their customers....

This is hell. I dont know who to use. I have one now and he seems ok but I just dont know. I dont know anyone from arond here that has done one here. So I have no clue on the lawyers.

I thought my first one seemed "OK" too. It didn't take me very long, though, and I didn't feel he was really going to fight for me...I didn't think he fully understood the situation. So I fired him. They don't make it easy to fire them, but it your ife we're talking about, so you need to feel they are doing everything they can for you. I interviewed a couple of attorneys and finally talked to someone that had used this one. He is expensive (like they all aren't?) but it looks as though it will have been worth it. A litle more time will show it.

In any profession there are good ones, bad ones, honest ones and dishonest ones. Jerk had it all figured out...he'd leave, have it figured out (a plan HE liked), I'd crumble, and he'd be a free man while continuing to control my life. I didn't crumble, I didn't agree to his plan, and he will NOT continue to control my life. But I couldn't have done it without an attorney.

Good point. Thanks.

That is so unfair. God I swear. Men get away with everything. They stab us in the back and get rewarded for it. My lawyer told me I have a shot at getting half. I sure the hell he is right. I will literally die if h gets away with this. I cant handle anymore rotten things in my life. I just cant

Lassryn,

I think you will be able to get something. My soon to be ex mother-in-law was able to get some income from her ex (my father-in-law) based on the number of years they were married.

But please take care of yourself. I think you are gonna find that even if he has to pay money, he isnt going to hurt the way you are, the way all of us here are hurting. I know I have days where I want to make my stbx suffer the way I do, but I cant because he doesn't care the way I do.

Hang in there. A day will come when this is a memory and not a living hell.

Thanks. I hope it comes soon. I cant take much more of this. 22 yrs he better not get away with everything. That will be it for me. I have always been there for him. He has never cared about me so I dont know why I am so hurt. But the aholes sure picked a wonderful time in life to do this didnt they? With the state of the country and life already getting harder?

When the going gets tough, cowards tuck tail and run while everyone else stands and fights. Jerk is a coward. I've got many days where I'd like to turn and run, but I've had plenty of conversations with myself and we agree...stand up and fight. Hang in there. We're here for you.