We had mediation this week, no, no closer to coming to an agreement on anything.

We all had to stop to explain to him (because he kept saying "I will do whatever the courts tell me to do") that we could decide before it went to a judge. He just does not get it, he is having everyone tell him what to do because he does not know.

He asked for us to stop talking at the beginning so he could play with his new phone. It was odd he kept writing down on his notepad and his lawyer repeated what he wrote. I talked for myself. We all stopped once because I was talking to him and he was not looking at me when I was talking, they made him look at me, he said he could hear me, he was again playing with his phone. Contradicting, stopping us so he would not miss anything while playing the first time, but when I talked- he could multi task.

We had to stop a lot and explain things to him. I feel as if something is wrong and I can not do anything about it. I just have to wait for something bad to happen. He is stuck in something that was, is not. He is telling everyone that all his problems was, is me. His problems is him and who he has struggled to be his whole life, not me. Divorce is not going to fix him.

I put many plans, offers, out to him, his only one was to keep us here and deny us from a better life. The kids are going to hate him for keeping us here living in poverty. I told him if we can't relocate than I am asking for more money, again we had to stop and explain. Money that we are being denied from him not allowing us to relocate and the possibilty to have the judge make that decision and lose the opportunity.

He kept saying I want a divorce today. We had to explain to him that is not the way it works. He all of a sudden wants the house to sell that has not been paid for a year now, that I live in with the kids. He wants us to stay here living in poverty denying us a better life. He wants to come and go as he pleases and thinks that his life and job is more important then mine and the kids. He wants me out and does not want to co-parent. I am sure there are bills that he has not shared the information with me.

I pray someone that is now involved in this mess see's what he has created, all the ill willed to make me look bad, the hostile enviroment he has put the kids and me in and all that he does not care about and what is actually in the best interest of the kids.

He will not even let us visit my family away unless I agree to exactly wha the says.

A lot of wants with no compromising, he can not see beyond his own nose. I have had to stop trying and I am now in the hands of the GAL, the therapist, the lawyers, the judge and it is the worst feeling. I want to think the glass is half full, stay positive to think that the life meant for us is good.

I know how you feel...I finally had to just put my faith in the judge & God because my stbx only wants to throw me out so he & his gold digging mistress can keep all the money...I would rather loss from the judge than to give him his way...I pray & hope everyday I come out ahead or at least more than what he is willling to give...My 4 kids won't even speak to their dad, because his mistress has got him by the balls & he's not man enough to take up for them over her...It is really sad but it is what it is...Lust

I think your behavior speaks for itself as does his and that the lawyers and the judge will take note of that. Keep you chin up and head held high because you are getting out it isn't an easy journey but I think it will be well worth it be rid of him so you and your kids can move forward and heal.

May,

I am so sorry you are going through with your stbx. Stay strong. I hope and pray the judge will see the truth and grant you what you and your children need.

Sadly, I have found that the stbx's don't want to compromise because they don't want to tell their new gf's that they talked or that they gave anything, or showed any kindness, because if they did they would be in trouble when they got back home. It makes for a very difficult situation.

I know its a terrible time right now but you will get through it, and you will see that in the end you are better of than he is. You will heal, go on to raise your children and love again. Meanwhile he will be stuck in the same old, same old bs only with a different woman paying the price.

Take care,
Teresa

I am hoping to avoid being in your shoes, but it's not looking very promising on my end, either. At least your stbx looked ridiculous in front of everyone. Jerk will look good to others. He can sell himself well, and he lies so well even he believes what he is saying! Jerk is mad that I'm relocating, but I'm not even going very far. Don't know exactly where, but closer to my family, which is less than 45 minutes away. He commutes farther than that to work! He wanted me to stay in this house, just down the road from him so he could continue to control my life. He is continuing to control every situation he can. He wants "his time" with the kids but when they are there they spend most of the time watching TV. He does what he does to look good to others. It isn't fair. And it's my kids that are paying the price. Keep us posted on how it's going.