I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only one whose heart skips a beat when I see his number show up on my cell as a text or a call. I've entered his name in my cell address book as Lying Cheating Pig. My phone speaks this name when it rings. I do get a chuckle out of that. But I do avoid his phone calls and let it go to voicemail and then I'm so nervous to listen to it that I wait until I have someone with me to listen to it. I also have others like my counselor read the emails he sends before me in order to help prepare me. I was never scared of him or of what he would say to me before the separation but now I'm scared to death that I'll get very upset and not be able to function the next day. I didn't realize how bossy and over bearing he was. I guess my own self confidence has taken a hit during all this stress and I don't feel like I can stand up to him right now.
I understand so clearly. I have the same thing where I feel like I can't function. And it could either be happy memories creeping up on me where I wish this separation had never happened or the flip side where he is so cruel and heartless. I look forward to the day when I have moved on enough that none of it has any meaning or impact on me.
I've entered his name in my cell address book as Lying Cheating Pig. My phone speaks this name when it rings. I do get a chuckle out of that.
Made me laugh. I have my ex's name listed as Jerk. I personalized his ring too. It is a LOUD siren sound (like on a submarine) and the guy yells "Warning, Warning the Jerk is calling." I love it!
I put it on vibrate when the kids are around so that they don't hear it but just knowing it is there makes my day.
I thought I was the only one that felt that anger when he calls or emails. I just want to go off on him. I do don't get me wrong. I don't hold back, I tell him exactly what I think of him and big foot.
lol Thanks everyone. Nice to know I havent lost a screw or something...i hope lmao. I see the pictures and our anniversary items and my heart breaks all over again. But WOW, when he calls all sanity and sadness goes flying merrily out the window lmao
I had this discussion with my therapist just today. She asked my why I continued to LET him control me in this way. I understand what she is saying, but I am still trying to wrap my hands around a way to make this not happen.