Well, the countdown is on. One week till I officially leave the house. One week till the STBX is served with Divorce papers. I am sad/hurt because I can not sit down and talk to him about that I want a divorce and that I want out and that I am sorry things didn't work out between us, and how we are two different people who have grown apart. I so want to tell him all of this, but, I cant due to his temper. The attorney told me to write a letter but not to show fault. How do you do that? I mean seriously? So, my letter will be short, sweet and goodbye. Anyways, I feel very anxious right now. I cant stop crying. I dont love him anymore. I dont have feelings for him but yet I feel bad. What is wrong with me? I know I am human and have feelings but why do I care how he reacts or how he feels after all the years of nothing? It sucks being a woman at times! LOL But I know this is the right choice. Thank you all. IF anyone has experience at a letter, let me know.... cuz I am beating my head trying to put the words on paper.
I don't have any experience with a letter but I wanted to let you know that it will get better. Even when you choose to leave you go through the grieving process so give yourself time to emotionally recover.
I didnt write a letter, but what I would say is just to write whatever you want to...everything you feel. Just get it all out. After that you can go back and edit what you shouldnt send.
My situation was similar to yours in that I wanted the divorce, not him. I remember the fear and sadness when I finally admitted to myself what I had known for so long..that I didnt love him anymore. I couldnt stop crying. Although leaving was the best thing for both of us, it still broke my heart. I knew he didnt want me to go (although he did nothing to help make things better) and that tore me up.
You say he has a temper...mine does too. If you send the letter just be prepared for him to not receive it well. I know you just want closure, but if he is looking at the situation anything like mine, he is feeling angry and jilted by you. My ex resents me for walking out and all I get now is anger and bitterness, no matter how civil I try to be.
In answer to your question...yes, it is going to get better.