Im so sorry to hear about your son, I have a daughter the same age and I know they know and have been damaged, but are seriously repressing it and sadly, I dont feel I could help them during a breakdown when I cant seem to help myself, probably just cry right along with them, so I applaude you, That scenairo would destroy me. Im 30, when I was young I couldnt understand women that dispised the opposite sex, and I know its not healthy to feel this way,but I dont really see the benefit of dedicating 12 years to a marriage. Thank you for your honest post and I am a mother too, so I know seeing your child hurting like that hurt you 100Xs more. Your lucky in that you have sons, with a strong mother they will develop healthy relationships with women in the future. Your husband may not know the hurt now, but eventually he will have to pay his dues.
Thanks for your post