Womans Divorce Forum

Discuss your troubles, compare ex's, offer suggestions, and share stories!

Womans Divorce Forum
Start a New Topic 
Author
Comment
View Entire Thread
Re: 10 months later... Should I just suck it up?

I agree with the others. I know this first step will be a hard one, but they will get easier as time goes on.

I am reminded of the strength and courage my aunt showed in a very tough situation and I will always admire her because of it.

When I was very young, I had an aunt who's son was dating a girl at a campground where their family went every summer. They became friends with this girls family and did things together. During the school year when my aunt could not always take her son to see his girlfriend because of her job...My Uncle would take him to visit her and stay to talk as well.

It so happened that my Uncle started seeing this girls mother behind my aunt's back while he had my cousin up there visiting his girlfriend...to make a long story short....My cousin ended up marrying this girl and my uncle(who I no longer consider my uncle) married this girl's mother.

Because of this my Aunt had to attend all kinds of event for her son along with this family and their relatives and the real hard part was that she had to face the fact that her new daughter-in-law is the daughter of the OW. My Aunt never looked down on her daughter-in-law for this and remained close to her son and daughter-in-law and for this I know I, along with so many others, will always admire the strength and love my aunt showed in such hurtful times. I think of my aunt when times for me get hard because of my own divorce. A mother's love never fails.

Susan

Re: 10 months later... Should I just suck it up?

Susan,

After reading about your AUNT and her sacrifice.......all i can say is WOWWWWW!!!!!
No one can do what she did for the sake of her love to her son. I can't.

I also admire you and all your posts. You sound like a very intelligent and a very spiritual woman. Keep posting. I look forward to read them. Thanks

Re: 10 months later... Should I just suck it up?

Dear Susan, Your story about your aunt brought tears to my eyes. Now I know where you get it. The grace and compassion you display must be in the genes. Thank you for sharing that beautiful story and so many other thought provoking posts.

Re: 10 months later... Should I just suck it up?

Thank you all so much for your words of wisdom. I just got home from meeting with my counselor. I had really wanted to agree on a decision when I left his office. I felt like I had, and then I read all your postings... now I know I made the right decision. With "appropriate boundaries", I will have over both sides of the family and our "mutual friends" who really have already taken sides. Agreeing to this does not mean I'm giving in to a teenager or saying everything he did is OK - it's about celebrating a very special occasion and remembering it's my daughter's day. But I am going to keep it SIMPLE!! I'll let you know how it goes - 4 weeks away!

Re: 10 months later... Should I just suck it up?

Your tone sounds so positive. Good for you! Do let us know how it goes.

Re: 10 months later... Should I just suck it up?

Oh gosh. Just for this one important day I say suck it up. Yes, you do have to think of yourself, but I would let your daughter have this one. It may not be the same as it was in the past, but that isnt her fault.

Do you have to have everyone over? Is going out somewhere...somewhere neutral where there will be a definate end point to the party an option?