I am so sorry. I completely understand how tough it is to go through the holidays and/or celebration for the first time. It is so cruel and unnecessary to expect your child to spend the day with big foot. But make no mistake about it, your son will be thinking of you. He knows who his mother is and he will want to make you happy on Mother's Day.
And you may not see it now, but once he is grown, he will be resentful of the parent who would not allow him to love the other. He wants both of his parents and unfortunately, the dad comes with a growth attached to him. But make no mistake about it, your son loves you and wants very much for you to be happy. Big foot will be his father's girlfriend or wife (as long as she is around). But you will always be his mother.
I am so sorry that this is happening to you. Yes he SHOULD realize that your son should spend the day with you. What an ASS that he doesn't.
I am in a position where my ex's first wive was a loser and his children from that marriage consider me MOM also. NO I was not a part of them getting divorced, we got together several years after their divorce. I knew when I married him that if I could not accept his children as my own I had no right to marry him. Have always treated them as if I gave birth to them. Some people feel I am wrong for this. Up theirs. Even now if something happens to me my Estate goes to ALL of them not just the ones I gave birth to. Not all 2nd wives are ********
Thank you for telling others to make sure they include it. I did and even though it is his weekend i will have the one son still living at home with me on Sunday.
I remember a Mother's Day many years ago. I don't recall where my two children were, but I remember going to a park near where I lived. There was a little stream with water running over the rocks. I sat there for about an hour watching the water and letting my mind wander. Although I was sad at being alone on that day, it was peaceful and calm, just watching the stream meander down the creek.
You'll get through this, but you'll probably never forget it.
Dear Ladybr, I was so sad to read your post. I would like to echo the others. You are his mother and no one can ever take your place. I am certain that your ex's relationship is not going to last. To many telltale signs keep coming up. I once again have to be so thankfull for my ex who always took my girls shopping to buy me gifts for everything birthdays, Xmas, mothers day ect. He did this as much for them as for me. They would get so excited to give me the gifts. I did the same for him as well. We really did have a special relationship. I was so surprized because usually things like that and your birthday you get with the kids in the custody order. I am a firm believer that what comes around goes around. One day you will actually feel sorry for this man when his actions all catch up to him. I will think of you all on mothers day. I pray each and everyone can enjoy this day. This is probably the most special of all days to those of us that are mothers.
In our custody orders I get the kids Mother's day between 1 and 7. Father's day he gets them between 1 and 7 as well. I just assumed this was a normal thing, I never asked for it. Mother's Day wasn't even a thought to me at the time. I am so sorry you will not have your child(ren) there with you on this special day. Like the other ladies said,Go out and try to do something special for yourself, you deserve it.