Womans Divorce Forum

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Womans Divorce Forum
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Re: Dating

To me, and this is just me, but if you are truly happy and you know for sure that you arent just latching on to someone (like I did once) then I dont think there is a time line. Just dont rush into it and just enjoy it. If you take it slow so you know without a doubt your real feelings, then I saw do what makes you happy. I have never been through a divorce before so I am totally new at this but if one thing I have learned from all this pain is you need to take care of you. If this guys makes you happy, then enjoy being with him. And you can enjoy someone without having to make commitments if that makes sense. Just be happy. :) I think we all make our own timelines depending on our different circumstances :)

Re: Dating

I'm in my fourth month of separation and was wondering the same thing. I don't want to sabotage the next relationship with paranoia and frustrations from my marriage and right now I'm just busy with finishing my masters and moving back. But I know when I come there is a big possibility that I will start dating someone. But I am trying to have some time for myself too and I won't be moving with a man anytime soon. I've been told to take things slow. It sounds like good advice to me.

Re: Dating

I don't think there are hard and fast rules, but I definitely rushed things. I began dating at 6 months post separation; went out with 3 guys and then met #4, whom I now live with, at 10 months after my separation; we lived together after 1 month. There is a difference between having dinner out and moving in with them. Evidently I did not know how to keep it light after a 30 year marriage. If you could do no sex for 1 year post separation it would truly benefit you in my opinion. I definitely have messed up my life even worse than it was when the ex left me for the OW.

Re: Dating

Theres no set time frame. Just be sure that you have no more hang-ups about your ex that could carry over into something new.

I too grieved my marriage before I left. We were done for about two years before I moved out. There was no communication, hugs or kisses, and at the time I left it had been a year and a half since we had sex. Still...for me it took 8mos before I started thinking of someone new. I needed time alone. Time to get adjusted to my new life and being on my own. I also wanted to make sure that I wasnt going to be taking any drama with me too.

I started dating and met some nice guys. No one I wanted to see again , but nice people all the same. Then I found my current bf.

Good luck and have fun!