Welcome. You are considering divorce. It's a complex thing. I think it really depends on the reasons you want the divorce. Each case is different and there is a lot to think about. First decide how much you want this. Is this something counseling can fix? Do you still want to be married to this man? Is this man a danger to you or your children?
In the meantime, making an escape plan is high on my list things to do before a divorce. Figuring out where you can go and how you can survive on your own (or with kids). Also do your research on the divorce laws in your state to figure out a) the process and b)your rights. A lawyer can help with this. I am sorry it has come to this, but the ladies here have a wealth of information to help you. We are here for you.
There is lot of thing I am scared and confused about... But one thing is for sure.... I want him OUT and I don't know how to do IT! I have been with him for 18 years , I raised his son for 15 years (now in his 2nd year of college), He has started disrepecting me and now my husband thinks that i should put up with this in my own home.
Short version of our life...
He moved in with me, We lived together 8 years before we bought our home, (which he did NO FOOTWORK AT ALL FOR) He does NOTHING but go to work. He ran around on me the first 11 years with his son's mother and they were both drug addicts, She moved away and the drugs and drinking continued, just with other people! He told me for years to GO DO ME & MAKE MYSELF HAPPY, so after 14 years of being withonly him, I cheated. he started cheating on me again with someone I know (but ain't direct friends with) and when I told him last year he didn't take it that well and begged me to stay and try to work it out!
He even went into and intensive out-patient drug rehab thing and I attened every friday with him.
I don't feel like my heart is with him after the things taking place the past few days!
I also got hit by a van in front of my house when all this was going on last year and have been out of work since. I am use to working and being able to take care of thing, but now he knows I am totally dependendant on him.
I don't want to loose my home or have to move, he is the one who destroyed this whole marraige.
What can I DO!!!!???? I need some help!