Dear Bridget, I would like to way in on being in favor of the reconstruction surgery if it is not going to put your health at risk. I am your exact age 62 and I know for myself I would have to do it. This would be for me and no one else. 62 is the new 42 you know. I think it might make you feel better to do something just for you. I am still very sexual and can't see that changing anytime soon. I know my mom still has sex and she's 81. Her husband is 12 year younger than her and she is very very well preserved. You hopefully will meet someone else in your life. I'm sure if they love you it isn't going to matter to them but I think it will matter to you. So if you feel up to it why not? I to am so greatful for my family! My oldest daughter is my rock and she is also a lawyer which doesn't hurt. My husband and I are on the long road to reconcilation. I was so lucky that I am one of the few on this site who isn't dealing with infidelity. My sex drive greatly exceeds my husbands so I don't think sex is his main concern. I'm really thrilled about the part time job! It will get you away in touch with people and give you an excuse to doll up alittle. I really wish there was some way to save your farm. Are you still making payments on it? Is it just to much for you to do by yourself? Could you keep part of it by sub-dividing it? Do you really need the money to live on? You must be or almost can collect social security. I hope you had a lawyer in this divorce. It sounds like you didn't fair very well? If I've asked to personal of questions please feel free not to answer. I just hate to see you have to give up on something you love so much! The bottom line though in all this is you and your well being. Take the best care of yourself you can. Don't worry about the pills. Someday you can probably cut down to just the liver meds and maybe the blood pressure meds. Just know you are valued so much on this site for your wisdom and caring. I will pray for God to leave you alone is you know what I mean. Keep up the good work in not calling the ex I am so PROUD of you. Just one minute, hour, day, week, month,year, life at a time Bridget. You are getting there. Just look at what you all by yourself have accomplished! You are an amazing women.

Kathleen you are a good person. I do not pay the mortgage on the farm, he does. But, he will only do that for a while then he will force me to turn it over to a realator. Right now I am selling it by myself to same the money I would have to pay the realator. So far he is ok with this. My kids don'tw ant me to stay here alone, I hate living alone also. One son it in Juneau Alaska and the other one is in Mobile Alabama!! I asked them if they could get any further away from eachother. They both want me to come live by them so right now I am thinking of spending the summer in Alaska and winter in Alabama. My son in Alabama has two kids, my wonderful 3 and 5 year old grandkids. I do want to see more of them but I hate that I have to change my life because he couldn't keep it in his pants more than once. And she is no prize, divorced twice, cheated on my ex years ago and wears more make-up than any ten women I know added together.
After I get settled in this new job I will rethink the reconstruction again. There is no time limit on that.
By the way I still have not contacted my ex...one day at a time.

Dear Bridget, Bravo to you my dear in not contacting the ex! I know you can do this! I know my grandkids are my whole world now. The relationship that we build with them follows them their whole lives. I am very involved with mine especially my beautiful
4yr old autistic baby girl. I stay with the therapist in the morning and take her to her school in the afternoons. I pick her sister up from school and take her to Karate or dance and help with homework. My days are very full and busy. It helped me alot while my husband and I were in crisis mode. I think that is really going to be your best bet! It will get you far away from the ex. I've heard there is a shortage of women still in Alaska. Nothing wrong with raising the odds. The sooner you can sell the farm the better I guess. Did you get awarded any spousal support? I live in California and I would have gotten it for life ( I was married 37 years) unless my husband retired which is what he will be doing either this year or next. It sounds like you have a concrete plan and hopely you'll not even care about the ex any longer. How long do these men think these women are going to stay around once the money isn't there anymore. That is going to be their problem and they deserve it!!!!! You know I've been told you can still homestead in Alaska. I don't know if that is true but you might be able to get something going there also. You will have the best of both worlds going back in forth between your son's. I'm sure they can use your help as well. Bridget try and stay busy and stay strong. You can do this. We are all praying for you!