Congratulations!!! I wish I could be as diligent. I go two or three days and then I find some stupid reason to text or call him. I want so badly to cut it off but it is so hard. I have been married to him for 23 years. He too thought we could be friends but doesnt understand how terribly hard that is on me. I still love him and being friends is so hard. He has a girlfriend (from after we divorced) and also thought I should be able to be friends with her but that didnt work out. I made him promise not to talk about her if we were together but it still hurts and being around him isnt the same anymore. Some days are harder then others but I am praying for the day when it doesnt bother me that he is moving on. It is hard because I am alone but someday it will not be that way. I know how you feel and I pray that you find continued strength to keep doing what you are doing because you deserve better then to be the other woman and he is a real jerk to expect that of you. Men seem to think they should have their cake and be able to eat it too. The only thing too much cake makes you is sick to your stomach.

It'll be okay:) Mine was a 3 year one...
Men don't give closure needed..
I wish time would speed up too, n memories fade

Bridget, My husband was unfaithful as well. It has been 11/2 years since we have spoken. I left him due to a violation that was so deep, the trust was unrepairable. My husband also showed no sensitivity, respect or interest in saving our marriage. Our divorce will hopefully be finalized soon. Not contacting my husband was one of the hardest things I have had to go through. Despite being difficult, I know with every fiber off my being that speaking or seeing my husband would only have led to emotional distress, which I couldnt emotionally handle or deserve. It has been very therapeutic for me to focus on healing & getting to know myself. I am starting to feel like the pain I am going through has brought out qualities in me that I admire. It takes a tremendous amount of courage to let go & walk away from someone that you love but know doesn't know, respect & cherish you the way you deserve. We make decisions at any given moment at the level of our self esteem. At this point in my grieving, I feel like it is no longer about my husband & what he did, it's about me. I can choose to learn from my experience, how I react, feel, think & what I do with my life. Much love ladies. May we all focus on nurturing our spirits, sense of self & develop better expectations of the character & qualities that we accept from others

I AM SO PROUD OF YOU!!!!

Thanks ladies. It truly is the hardest thing for me now. I miss him every day and night and I still think this can not have really happened to us. We got along so well and always liked doing everything together when he was home, evidently he enjoyed doing everything when he was away too. I hate that our family is forever torn. We can never take our grandkids on a vacation together, never have a holiday or birthday together again. These jerks just do not realize and do not care how far reaching what they have done is. I have nieces and nephews and he was their only uncle...now they have none. It just touches so many people but the only one he ever thought about was himself. It is just so hard to make sense out of and for me I have to be able to make sense out of things to be able to deal with them and then put them away. Not happening this time, but I am determined not to contact him. I may be able to do that but even that hurts because he is not trying to contact me either and that hurts. I really don't know what I will do if he calls or emails. I hope to stay strong and move on soon. We have been divorced for 8 months 1 week 2 days now. Where is that georgous kind loving man I need in my life....my ex was not him.
I do lay awake and just want to pick up the phone to hear him answer it but I don't...I just lose sleep over it and still cry over it. Makes me so angry.

Why men lie... have no idea

14days.. yep thats hard

im on 6days no email
14 no talk
2.5 months no contact..

alllmost there..overit

I am so proud of you Bridget!! It is hard but I think it's for the best in the end. It is awful though to need something you can't get. I too need to understand things. Like you I feel that I require understanding to deal with this and move on. My husband is probably moving 1400 miles away to be with her, also leaving an entire family who needs him. I will never understand that so I guess I'll be searching for another way to move forward. You stay strong girl!! You can do this!!!!

Dear Bridget, You are amazing! You can do this! 14 days is a lifetime in this situation. Please do not weaken this far into the game. I so admire your strength. Just wanted to chime in here as well.

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement. I am determined, my brain is determined anyway but the heart is the hard part. One thing that helps me stick to it is when I really want to email him I come on this site and read posts and it just makes me want to stick to the no contact all the more.
The sad thing is when I think I am suffering the most and I come on here and read posts there are many that have it so much worse. I certainly wish there was no need for this site, but I am so very glad you are all here and that I found you. We are all stronger than we think we are and somedays I feel that way, there are others when I feel that I just can't do this anymore and again that is when I come on here and ther is always so much love coming from all of you it just makes my day.
These men (and I use that term losely) truly do not know what they have lost.

No they don't know what they have lost but I hope it's true that they will all eventually figure it out and regret what they have done.

Amen to that Alone. These relationships are new to them and the OW. Real life will happen sooner or later. We have history which makes us stick it out longer. They do not and may not go the distance if it isn't as WONDERFUL as they all thought it was going to be. The ex's are far from perfect people which is evidenced by what they have done to us. The OW are going to get a chance to see their real colors someday. They have had to cut the assets in two so financially they aren't as attractive either. Just wait ladies it will all come to pass.
You will all get to have the last laugh in the end.

Sorry to say in my case the OW does know what she is doing, she has done this before. She is in it for what she can get and tells him exactly what he wants to hear. He travels all week so is only with her on the weekends and it is then party time for them. They go out drinking and out to dinner and he buys her things and pays her to let him live there on the weekends. She knows exactly what she is doing, he on the other hand has no clue. She saw an easy target and reeled him in. He was having a mid life crisis at 55 and thought the grass would be greener. But as I have said on here before, he wanted to live with her so he would have no responsibilities but still talk to and see me on the side. He really thought there was no reason not to do that. Why in the world wouldn't I want to stay friends with him. He actually told me I needed to grow up because I said as long as she is still in the picture I would have nothing to do with him, I will not be second best. He just can't get that. What he wants should be no problem for everyone else!!! I just hate that I wasted so many years on this guy and this is what he turned into. Ok that said, I am going into day 15 and counting. I have it marked on the calendar right by the computer so I have to look at it when I get tempted to contact him. No temptation today at all!!