I'm trying to keep it together here and not let my anger get the best of me but I need HELP!! I just found out that my daughter was not at her father's last night but stayed over in an adjacent state after attending a concert there. The last plans I heard on Friday were that they would be spending the night at his place Sunday night and she would be home on Monday. She's till not home and it's 5:30pm. I asked about 3pm when she would be home. She said they were on their way. So I figured 30 mins. 2 hrs later I checked and she's still not home so I asked again and she says they are on the road. I asked exactly where she was and she says Rt. 95. I asked if they spent the nite at his apartment. She said no. They stayed there and went to the beach and shopping and that he texted me to tell me. I NEVER GOT A TEXT!!!!!!
I'm so mad I could cry. This is just his way of saying he can do whatever the hell he wants with her(she's 17 yrs). Just another slap in my face! God, I hate him so much!!!
Dear Susan, It is really hard to be in your position. Was she without adult supervision? Was he with her? It is a fine line to walk with our children at this point in life. They are almost adults in the eyes of the law. They are trying to pull away from us and have control over their own lives. I realize there has to be boundaries but you must also not drive your daughter away. I had so many problems with my daughter when she was 18 (an adult under the law) She was a model child until then good student. I was to strict and she dropped out of college after 5 weeks and went to work in a ski resort with her bum boyfriend. He life has been a mess. She is now almost 40. Believe it or not the bum boyfriend went on to be a millionaire and she had my grandson by him. The never married. He was extremely abusive and they finally split up when my grandson was 14 yrs old. My daughter got almost nothing and I got my grandson. It was a real mess! Thankfully my grandson is now attending USC college doing will and daughter got married to a loser. This of course is an extreme example. I lost the line of communication with her is my point in telling you all of this. I realize the ex sounds like a controlling you know what but put yourself in her shoes. She had a great time and you seemed like you may have nagged her? I'm by no means saying this is right! My daughter left because she wanted her freedom from ME. We went to counseling for 5 yrs when she finally came home. She was an adult but went because it was so important to me to mend our relationship. I learned so much. I was so blessed my ex was a saint. He was the best dad in the world. What a lucky break for me. I hope I did not affend you it wasn't my intention at all. I just hoped I could pass on my life experience and maybe spare you some of the pain I went through. You are in my thoughts and prayers.