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Want to save marriage - is it ok to let go?

I’ve been married for 10 years. Haven’t been attracted to my husband since beginning. We have a 4.5 year old daughter who’s full of life and love and warmth and excitement. I want I make this marriage work. When we got married, my husband was very smitten by me but was very raw and rude /unpolished by nature. Very nitpicky and nagging. That further hindered me feeling attracted to him.

Now I really want to make this marriage work and am looking for his qualities that I like- like he’s very strong emotionally and one can lean on him emotionally.

But he says there’s no spark left. And he doesn’t want to try with me. We will be trying counseling and seeing how that works. Would help smoothen things whatever the outcome.

What should I do? My daughter loves my husband so much. If this marriage can be saved and be an intimate happy one at that, I would be the most thankful person ever!

What should I do? In the past I did however feel that I would have loved to feel the passion in a relationship. Only one life we get for all we know. Is it possible to become very passionately attracted later on in life to someone you were never initially attracted to?

He is a passionate guy, just hasn’t been able to instilled that emotion in me for him. Would it be possible with counseling and hence more communication?

Re: Want to save marriage - is it ok to let go?

At over age 50, reading this...…..it's very sad to be with someone who is raw, rude, nitpicky and a nag. It is common in my experience that most men want to appear emotionally strong even if that is not their nature. Do you suspect he may be having an affair on line or otherwise since he doesn't want to try in the marriage? Sounds like he would make a good visiting Daddy, but is not husband material. Sorry you have gone through this. I hope you can get a consultation with a Family Divorce Attorney regarding a possible separation/divorce to see what is at stake sometime in the new year. If he doesn't want to try counseling, then it is probably over. Make sure you get your child support if you both separate. Best wishes to you and your child.

Re: Want to save marriage - is it ok to let go?

The relationship should be viewed as it is right now. If it was not good since the beginning it probably won’t improve now. You need to stand up for yourself. I had same issues