Womans Divorce Forum

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Womans Divorce Forum
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Re: Can't leave, Can't Stay so Now What

Get yourself a great female lawyer. If he hasn’t worked in two years a judge is unlikely to be sympathetic to give him anything. Judges do not tend to look favorably on lazy freeloading husbands.

Re: Can't leave, Can't Stay so Now What

Great advice!!! Empower yourself. Claim happiness and keep it moving. Don't look back. Life is too short. Fast and pray for guidance. It works. Female Empowerment!

Re: Can't leave, Can't Stay so Now What

Before I filed for divorce, a few things helped me.

I went to counseling on my own; it helped me a great deal to talk through my choices, reactions to him, etc.

I was able to start building my own life that didn't depend on him, I had girls night with friends, did things on my own, I was able to separate myself emotionally from him so that when he got angry and went on a ranting fit, I didn't care. I was able to just stay calm, look at him and not let it bother me.

So, if you stay with him work on making your own choices for yourself, build your own network of friends and support.

Re: Can't leave, Can't Stay so Now What

Amen. Counseling helps tremendously. Work on yourself. Everything else will fall in place. 🙏

Re: Can't leave, Can't Stay so Now What

This is great perspective and advice.

Re: Can't leave, Can't Stay so Now What

Divorce is horrible For everyone . Of course, if he’s inflicting any kind of pain, be it mental or physical, then get out. But, if you have enough love for this man to try counseling and save your marriage, you should give it a try. I divorced after 28 years. It has been 4.5 years of emotional roller coaster. Some days I feel straight up bat**** crazy. There is fear of being alone. It feels a whole lot different making an important decision on your own when you’ve bounced thoughts off your partner for so many years.
Your kids... wow, they are unpredictable. You could get lucky and they don’t get angry with either of you in my case, my only son turned on me ( completely unexpected) he and I were very close. He’s my world and I would do anything for him. now has nothing to do with me.
I would advise you to step back and take a breath. If there is even a shard of hope, you should try to work it out. Divorce is not simple. Starting over is not simple. Starting a new relationship with someone new is not simple. I can’t sugar coat it. Divorce sucks and I wouldn’t wish it in my worst enemy.
I just want to say again, if there is any kind of abuse, please take care of yourself and family and do what best.