Of course his attorney wants that! Because that would suit his client nicely wouldn’t it, if they are not your bills!

Seek your own legal and financial advice ASAP. Be careful they don’t also try to claim spousal maintenance from you too, if you earn more than him. Gather up every shred of evidence you can about what you’ve paid versus what he’s paid for during the relationship. Bank statements, credit card statements, proof of income...anything you can legitimately show a court and obtain legally. A court may be able to issue a subpoena for him to HAVE to provide financial records if he becomes secretive about sharing info with the court.

Don’t expect that ‘even if you did’ go ahead and do what his lawyer wants, that this would be the end of it all. This could simply be the first ‘stage’ of many he and his lawyer have planned. He’s clearly consulted a lawyer. Time for you to also.

Financial abuse and controlling behaviour is a facet of domestic violence. Do you have any women’s legal support services where you live who could offer you generic free legal advice? Google ‘domestic violence services and support’ in your area, and see what ‘pops up.’

Don’t play their game Mary. Chose your next move wisely, like a game of chess. This isn’t just about ‘the now.’ This is also about how filing for bankruptcy could impact you, your credit score, and potentially employability in the future. Guard your reputation...This man clearly needs to grow up and act decently towards you. Time to put your stiletto’d heel down and draw a line in the sand with it which h he can’t cross...