I’m only 27. I’ve known my husband for 10 years, but too much damage has been done to recover from. I love him, and I don’t doubt he loves me. But I think we’re trying so hard to make this work that we’re doing more harm than good. He was having a lot of online affairs within the first year of us being married, and at the end of that year I moved out with hopes of us being able to mend things from a distance. It wasn’t good for me to be in the same house anymore. I was terrified of that decision too, but looking back I have no regrets. I’ve never had the chance to really be on my own. I went from home to with him and I never let myself have the phase between. His mother was a huge wedge between us as well. He depended more on her than me and our marriage. Ultimately he hasn’t changed. And it’s going on 3 years of us living apart. I think it’s inevitable, we can’t keep dragging this out. He’s all I know and he’s not a bad person, he’s done some crappy things and I’ve suffered some emotional damage from it all. I’m just scared of moving into a chapter of everything being unknown
You are still young and you deserve happiness. I would suggest marriage counseling or seeing a lawyer to know your rights. I don't know if your marriage is worth saving looking from the outside but it doesn't sound like you are happy.
If you have been apart for 3 years, don’t you think you have your answer? You are young, you have so much life left. Do you want to spend it on a man who will more than likely continue his online activities? How long before those online activities turn into real physical affairs? I have been married 21 years and am dealing with a cheating husband who I have forgiven numerous times, I have finally realized I am not a priority to him and neither is our marriage. I have tried, but one person can not try to save a marriage if the other does absolutely nothing. As for his mother, my husband was extremely close to his parents, too close for my comfort. He could always drop everything to help them in any way, but I was expected to vacuum the house with a broken leg, just one example. Best of luck