Divorce is one of the scariest things you will ever do especially after a long term marriage. I let my ex bully me for decades. When I finally had enough I knew I would never look back. Knowledge is power. If you can consult with an attorney. and do so as soon as possible
Keep your cards close to your.vest. Being prepared by gathering records and documents makes the process so much easier. He has shown you who he is and it isn’t good. Do not support him. Save all the money you can which you will need. So many women give away the farm trying to save the marriage and it never seems to work. You will feel so many emotions. Divorced now for 2 years and my life is now my own and I am at peace.