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Re: Maybe someone wants to share stories and support each other?

Hi Ruta,

Nice to connect with you here. Thank you so much for sharing your story and the links. I am recently going through a divorce. It was a very toxic relationship that included psychological, emotional, physical, and financial abuse. My husband was diagnosed with ADHD nearly 8 years prior to our marriage but together, he and his family decided to conceal this fact from me. There were many aspects of his life that were a secret such as his drug addiction and past relationships. Throughout our marriage I was lied to and as you can imagine my trust is completely shattered.
When all hope of trying to fix our marriage seemed to be lost and I became suicidal, I finally decided to leave and came back to stay with my family. Needless to say that my decision was not received well and I continued to get angry calls where he would verbally abuse me, demean me, criticize me and blame me for the breakdown of our marriage. I was so traumatized that for a year I could not sleep properly, would get panic attacks, and nightmares, and would cry uncontrollably whenever I was alone. It is important to state that during this time, even my family didn't believe me as he would pretend to be so charming in front of everyone else.
Luckily, through my cousin, his ex-fiance contacted me and told me about her relationship with him. I was shocked to find the similarities between her story and mine. Weeks later, I decided to confront my husband with these new facts and that's when he told me that he was diagnosed with ADHD but refused to accept that his mental condition had anything to do with the problems in our marriage. In his anger, he would throw things, punch holes in the walls, doors, throw food in the mall (oh yes he loved creating a scene in the public), shout at me while we would be outside, push me aggressively against the furniture, yell at people at the stores and road and drive like a maniac causing me to fear for my life.
When I told him to show me his medical records so that I would understand his condition better and we could work on our marriage accordingly, he refused and decided to file for divorce instead. His ex-fiance told me that his untreated ADHD had become severe and had reached the stage known as bipolar disorder. Whatever the whole truth may be, I still suffer from nightmares and cannot function like I used to because I have a long journey of healing before me.