Time to see a lawyer hun. If the apartment is a rental, I’d look at breaking the lease just to move out of this toxic situation. If its owned/mortgaged, seek legal advice about a divorce/property settlement. There may be the potential for you to continue living there, but this would need to be explored legally.

You are right: He’s trying to have his cake and eat it. Please stop cooking and cleaning for him immediately. Get checked for STDs also if you’ve been sleeping together while he’s been having sec with others…

Get rid of him out of your life hun. He’s toxic and sounds like he’ll never change. On the website Mumsnet, they have an expression for men like him: C&ck Lodgers!!!