Dear Angie,

I just wanted to reach out to you and say I am so sorry you are going through this. I know the shock and hurt you are going through is overwhelming. I too am going through a divorce and felt like everything was a nightmare when my ex told me he wanted a divorce. The betrayal you are feeling is justified and you should never ever be treated like that by anyone. Please do take care of yourself and know that you are worth so much more than to be treated like that.

I know your decision was very hard to make and that you are heartbroken from the lost dreams/hopes you had built with him. But I will share with you what people have told me. You are going to be okay and he will come to regret it.

I am sure your kids would not want you to be treated in that way. Please do seek support from your kids and friends. I am sure they would support you if you reach out.

Please self soothe and take care of yourself. Sleep enough, eat well, exercise if you can. I am doing the same and trying to look forward.

Wishing you peace, protection, and warmth during this time.

Thank you! I have 2 daughters and that is a huge reason why I am strong enough to leave him and make the decision I have made. I would never want them to have their partner treat them the way I have been treated. I don't want them to think that this kind of behavior is okay just because he says he is sorry and that he will change. I have been drinking because I don't know what else to do and just want it to go away. At the same time, I know that that is not the healthy way to deal with the issue. I am sorry for what you are going thru as well. As women, I feel that we have the weight of the world on our shoulders and are always taking care of everyone else and putting ourselves last. I know that you will get thru what you are going thru as well. That's what women do. We may get knocked down, but we always get back up and become stronger because of what life has thrown at us.

Hi Angie,

Yes, I also agree that we hold so much weight on our shoulders. But the fact that you came to this decision for your daughters and yourself shows what a great person/mom you are. You are strong and even seeking help shows strength.

Please do not try and hide from the pain through drinking because it is only hurting you more rather than helping. I would like to recommend less than 1 full glass of wine as that is what is recommended for women and alcohol consumption. Alcohol will depress you more and you need all the positive energy at this time. It has so does hurt your liver and it is a wonderful organ that helps clean our bodies. Have you tried walking? Do you have a mall you can walk around? A park? Do you have a pet you can walk with?

Is there family that can come by and stay with you for a little while to support you?
Some storms are unbearable but are made bearable by those who bear it with you. I have found that seeking help from those around me is the best decision I have ever made. I found that God has put the perfect people like puzzle pieces to help keep me moving forward despite this crisis. I am sure he has done the same for you as well, whether it be coworkers, friends, and family.

Someone told me this phrase "This too shall pass." I hope you can hold onto these words and find hope through the tunnel you are walking. I often feel like I am climbing a dark misty staircase with only one next step visible at a time. I don't know if you believe in God, but I truly do believe he's watching over each of us. I feel that every step I take is so very hard. But I know he has had my hand in his and continously repeats aloud "you are not alone" whether I choose to hear or not. Please continue to keep taking that one step forward.

Thank you for your support for me as well. No one tells you that you don't just go through the grief cycle once but many times. It is hard. I do feel like my emotions are all over the place as well.

This too shall pass.

thank you so much for your words of positive encouragement. I do believe in God. I actually had a friend of mine reach out about a month ago to invite me to her church. I am going to take her up on the offer and start going this Sunday. They also have an AA Group once a week starting Oct 3rd. So, I am going to start attending that as well. I do want to live a happier life and I know that the answer is not with alcohol. So, I am looking into other alternatives to help me be strong in a positive and healthy way. I want my daughters to see the correct way to handle hard situations in a proper way. I truly appreciate talking with you and you have certainly helped me! You are correct, this too shall pass!!