I have such a long story. My ex-husband's and I divorce was finalized this past March. This is the second time that he wanted a divorce. 6 years ago we with through the whole process with divorce lawyers. This time he wanted to go with a mediator because of money. I went ago with it because I was not making him happy. Once I moved out of the house he started texting me and being very nice and sweet. He was texting almost everyday which he never did before. Then right when the divorce papers needed to be signed he texted asking if we should dig deep and figure things out. A week later he texted asking if counseling was still on the table. ( I had asked to go to counseling and he said no.). I had moved out with our 4 kids and just felt to guilty to them and my family for all of their help if I would of went back. I said let's go to counseling on our own for a while and see how things go. His response was that he didn't know how that would work with all the money is was going to owe me from our settlement. Never anything about loving him. When I asked me about that he said why can I see his love through all that he does for me and the kids. We are in constant contact with having 4 kids very active in sports and school. Now last week I found out that he is talking with another women. I know this should not matter but the last week has been horrible. I can do nothing but blame myself for the divorce. How do you move past your ex moving on when you really didn't want a divorce and you are putting all of the blame on yourself. I can't seem to put any of the blame on him when he was the one who wanted it. I have been going to counseling but it has not helped as much as I thought. I felt like I was doing ok and now all the wounds are opened up again.

Hi, I can't really give you any advice, but i thought you at least should get í hear you, and nothing of this is easy, i fall apart regularly. Although it initially sounds like he wanted to try counselling and try and work on things his actions doesn't really reflect that. I often wonder why they get to be happy, and get what they want and we are left stranded in a bloody mess. All i can tell you is take one day at a time, cry when you need to as long as you get back up. Thinking of you.