Married 25 years, together 29. It all came to a crashing badly when I couldn't take his abuse any longer. It really wasn't that I couldn't take it, it was more that I couldn't take watching my children take it. He was never going to change like he promised so many times. I believed so many lies. I'm so tired. This is so hard. All I want to do is get away from him, but all he wants to do is hurt me. Why is everything in his name? If everything is 50% mine why can he cancel everything and leave me scrambling? It's exhausting but that's all he has left to try to hurt me with. He's still trying to hurt me and I'm still trying to escape. I just want peace but it seems so far away. I live for my kids now. I have no life. Everything was destroyed or is being destroyed. I don't know how to get a life back. I've lived with him so long, I don't know anything else. This is so hard! I wasted too much time believing he could change rather than that was who he is. I'm old and tired now. I have no idea what to do next.