Womans Divorce Forum

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Re: how long do i grieve?

Oh Rachel I'm so sorry this all sounds so familiar the anger different rooms grown apart checked out long time ago but my anger is no longer about his affair ....he let me believe everything was OK intimate but distant till the day he walked out. He left every 1 of his possessions collected over 20 odd years. Every night and morning I have conversations in my head what I'm going to say to him....but sadly I can't...I feel sick when I watch TV and see many different places we ve visited and know he ll take her there he has already taken her to our fav hotel in the Highlands of Scotland and cry thinking of them together. People say I'm better off without him as he was emotionally cruel towards me but I can't get over this and don't know where to begin. I'm a young 65 Yr old and he was a recovering alcoholic of 5yrs I've never lived on my own and feel so lonely 😥

Re: feel so sick and alone

Not sure if this will post. My husband of 8 years left the other week and although things were drifting, he decided he had had enough. He came back the next day making promises telling me he couldn’t live without me and then a few days later things were not ‘brilliant’ enough for him. I new he was going to leave so I asked him to. He then told me a few days later he had started to see someone else and only met her at the weekend, you don’t use the term seeing someone if you met them at the pub. I have been very calm, collected but I’m dying inside. The waves of anxiety are awful.

I don’t want him back, I think eventually I’ll be happier but the way he done it and never explained or tried just shocks me, I thought I was more than that.

Re: feel so sick and alone

It just happened 5 days ago, and I know today that things were not ok between us. But I considered him as my best friend, it hurts so bad not having him around anymore. I've decides to move out , we are talking very normally with no fights, but now I feel alone in my sister's house at a place that it's not my house. The insecurities have arrived with full weight, and I don't know how to deal with it, my mind goes directly to think about him and how I miss his company. I'm very afraid to talk to him about this and lose the person I want by my side as my best friend. What do I do? And how do I deal with this pain?

Re: feel so sick and alone

Hi Tati,

I am so sorry to hear that. My husband told me he wanted to separate couple of months ago. He started the divorce proceedings on the 9th. I went through a roller coaster of emotions and I am still going through a roller coaster. Every day is a new day and each day is dominated by a different emotion. Going to work helps but then my ex husband who used to be my best friend also works there. So I try to schedule such that I dont have run ins.

How are you holding up?