Womans Divorce Forum

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Re: Would like to hear from women who left their husbands

I just recently left my husband about 2 weeks ago. We’ve been married for two decades and had found out he was having an emotional affair for… 2 years. Makes you wonder how long this would have been going on had I not found out. Anyway, I tried to recover myself but had a huge awakening when I found out. I realized how broken our marriage has been for many years and knew it was time to leave to heal and to really connect with myself. We had children very young at the age of 16 and have been together since. I think we both have always been in emergency mode and the reality is we grew apart a long time ago, or even never truly connected except for the connection to our children and determination not to be like our abusive parents. I’m currently looking at apartments right now for a long term separation.

Re: Would like to hear from women who left their husbands

I just told my husband 2 days ago that I am filing for divorce. I spent 2 months consulting with an attorney, changed my will and beneficiaries on life insurance etc. this is a second marriage for both of us, I was widowed and was divorced. I have 3 grown sons, youngest is 18 and he has a 12 and a 13 year old who live with us 50% of the time. Our major issue is we have large income disparities and he completely took advantage of my generosity. I am generously helping him get set up in apartment that doesn’t change the kids school, giving him furniture and everything he needs to set up there. He came to the marriage with next to nothing because his first wife really screwed him over. I foolishly thought that I was helping him get back on his feet when we married and he would rise to the occasion. At least I got a prenup!
Now he is laying on the guilt that he is going to die alone, I’m ruining his kids lives, the whole world is going to turn against him. I really don’t hate him and I do feel awful about his kids which is why I am helping him with the apartment. I don’t have to do any of this according to the prenup but I still care enough about him and especially about his boys. It’s an emotional roller coaster right now.

Re: Would like to hear from women who left their husbands

Like you I too had made the severe mistake of marrying the wrong specimen. I cannot refer to that thing as human. In my case, he was a compulsive liar, delusional, ungodly, starved for attention among other things. I'm convinced that he's the product of inbreeding so thank GOD ALMIGHTY I refused to have children with him (especially after seeing both sides of his family tree). When I made a clean getaway from the satanic midget, I lived with my mother until I landed a job out of state. He had liked knowing I was at my mother's as his way of keeping tabs on me. He was stupid enough to ask my mother of my whereabouts and when she refused to tell him, he got a married couple we had known for about a year to call my mother to have her ask me to call them and they tried to find out my whereabouts. Fortunately I was with a real man (my current hubby) who wouldn't let him get anywhere near me.

A former co-worker of mine had been in the same situation. She was married to an abusive and lazy pig who refused to work and expected her to make all the money. If she didn't make enough money in tips, he'd beat her. She finally got away from him and it didn't take long for her to land a new husband who just happened to be a former customer. He helped her escape her abusive husband by leaving her his car when he had to leave for a business trip. When her husband hit her for telling him they were through, she immediately went to the police dept. One of the cops even gave her his card and told her to phone him even if he was off duty if he ever came after her again. Her husband was arrested that same night.